That’s the Way Love Goes

Sunday morning the Gregalicious slept late, and I feel good this morning. I stayed up late to watch Saturday Night Live return, and wasn’t terribly impressed. Our Internet also kept going in and out all day, which was annoying, especially during football games. The three games I primarily watched–Kentucky-Mississippi, Auburn-Oklahoma, and Georgia-Alabama, were all excellent games–and I also switched over to LSU-South Alabama periodically, but it was also a blow out so didn’t need to watch much. Still unsure how this season is going to shake out for everyone, which makes it interesting. I think there’s a lot more parity in the conference now, once you get past the clearly best teams this year (right now, I am going out on a limb and saying it’s Alabama and Texas, both teams LSU has to play in Baton Rouge this year) I think everyone is pretty equal for the most part, with the usual suspects (Mississippi State, Vanderbilt) in the basement. Kentucky almost beat Georgia last week and did beat Mississippi yesterday; Georgia almost beat Alabama, and that Auburn-Oklahoma game came down to the wire. The Saints play at noon today, which is cool, playing the Dirty Birds in Atlanta.

I did manage to get some things done during the games; I cleaned the downstairs bathroom thoroughly, I ran some errands in the morning (mail, Fresh Market, car wash) and then came home to start watching football. I also read, while in my chair, both We Have Always Lived in the Castle by Shirley Jackson and The Stepford Wives by Ira Levin (more on both later), so hope to start the new Gabino Iglesias at some time today, most likely during the Saints game. Jackson and Levin are excellent writers whom I deeply admire, with completely different styles but evoking the same feelings when you read them. I also managed to get most of the dishes finished yesterday, with whatever I used yesterday as the only dirty dishes left in the sink–and that will take about two minutes, tops. I had thought about delaying my trip to make groceries until tomorrow, but now that I am up I think I’ll go ahead and do that this morning and get it out of the way.

I also want to work on the kitchen a bit today, and I also want to get the floors worked on again. Sparky tears up the rugs all the time when he’s running around like a demon to burn off some of his Big Energy, and the longer they are messed up the worse they get messed up. I also have some other posts I need to get done this morning before I leave to make groceries; and the longer I let them sit there unfinished, the more likely it is they’ll continue unfinished. I have a particularly spicy one about transphobia that I’d love to get done at some point so I can Substack it (and attract more of the bigots and Nazis there), and of course, there are any number of others unfinished as well. Heavy heaving sigh. I also have three book reviews/reports to write–I’ve now finished The Price by Armen Keteyian and John Talty; an arc of We Are Watching by Alison Gaylin, and Everybody Knows by Jordan Harper, and I need to get those done sooner rather than later as well. I also have some emails I need to answer as well as some to generate.

Sounds like a to-do list to me, doesn’t it? I also need to clean up the mess around my desk. But the key is not to get overwhelmed by the length of the to-do list, and just start marking things off. I also need to work on the Scotty Bible today, but I can also see that I am starting to think in the old bad anxiety/stress markers by overwhelming myself with so much to do already. Next weekend I have an eye appointment, so I can order new glasses, and my doctor’s appointment is coming up. I am probably going to meet Dad in Alabama weekend after next, and will probably go up to Kentucky later this month. How exciting!

And on that note, I am going to head into the spice mines. Have a lovely Sunday, Constant Reader, and hope everyone in North Carolina and Tennessee are okay.

If You Love Me Let Me Know

I slept late this morning, but feel good now that I am awake. I did stay up later than I should have watching games last night, but I couldn’t turn off the Georgia-Kentucky game until the end. Georgia survived their closest non-Alabama game in quite a while, before prevailing 13-12 in a nail-biter in Lexington. My coffee tastes wonderful this morning, and I am slowly swimming up from the depths of Morpheus-induced slumber (strongly aided by Trazodone). When I first got up I debated maybe you don’t have to make groceries today but I really do need to. The Saints game starts at 1, so I’ll probably go during that to avoid traffic and other shoppers; New Orleans is a ghost town during games, and as long as I am home to catch the second half, that should do the trick. I did have a good day yesterday, despite all the games I watched; I was able to get more work done on the Scotty Bible (finding more discrepancies in the series), I did read some more of Everybody Knows, I got the dishes done finally, and did some cleaning around here, which is cool; it was nice coming downstairs and not seeing a pile of dirty dishes in the sink. I also worked some more on the books and straightened up the living room. Still need to do more cleaning, but am very pleased with the State of the Lost Apartment.

LSU played early yesterday, and it was a nail-biting, sloppy game with lots of penalties (and I feel like the officials kind of had their thumb on the scale a bit for LSU; some of the calls they made raised my eyebrows, and I was rooting for LSU. They did wind up winning, 36-33, but they look like they haven’t completely gelled as a team. Garrett Nussmeier can throw for sure, but there was also some incredibly stupid play-calling by the offensive coordinator (I was reminded of the Les Miles era; I wasn’t the only one because a headline on the Times-Picayune reads “Les Miles would have enjoyed LSU’s sloppy 36-33 win”). It was also weird because we actually don’t know how good South Carolina really is; they trounced Kentucky last week, and last night Kentucky almost knocked off Georgia, only to lose to LSU this week. After the LSU game ended, I watched Florida’s season start circling the drain again as they got trounced at home by Texas A&M, who lost to Notre Dame last week; you see how this is going? This is, I think, going to be an extremely strange season, and right now I am picking Texas to win the SEC.

Tulane also lost to Oklahoma yesterday, but they gave the Sooners what-for before going down to defeat.

I did run out yesterday to the Fresh Market to pick up a few things–fresh ground hamburger for grilling, and a meal kit of shrimp scampi for tonight–and so heading over to the West Bank today (which I was on the fence about when I got up) doesn’t seem as daunting now that I am waking up. Paul might have his trainer today, and thus will be gone for a bit anyway; perfect timing, and I can also stop for lunch at either Five Guys or Sonic; this decision is a tough one, frankly, but will probably go for Sonic. (These are the important decisions I face down every day, you know.)

I also took notes on the next chapter of the book, which I hope to tackle at some point this week. It’s Chapter Five, where I always have trouble in a first draft (come to think of it, Never Kiss a Stranger also stalled out at Chapter Five), but the good thing to come out of Hurricane Francine is now I remember how it goes and how it feels and how it sounds to ride out a hurricane. I know this is where Venus and Blaine turn this into an actual crime story–the dead body in front of their place the boys find in Chapter One–and it’s going to be really fun figuring out the rest of this book, I think. But I think I have an excellent grasp of what this chapter needs to be to move the story forward, plus it’s more of an intellectual puzzle of sorts because they can’t really go out and do any investigating because of the storm conditions. It’s so nice to feel excited about writing again, Constant Reader, you have no idea.

The story of Springfield, Ohio, and its perfectly ordinary Haitian immigrant population, working hard and building a better life for themselves and their families in this country with the opportunities here, despite the deeply imbedded racism and xenophobia they’ve surely encountered since being recruited to immigrate to Springfield to keep the town from dying. Now that the right’s candidates have decided to target that small town with blood libel and slander and racism, the town’s public schools, city hall, and hospitals have all been receiving bomb threats, because the Right has embraced stochastic terrorism for years now. There’s nothing American or patriotic about any of this, and the Right thinks it’s funny and laugh about it, particularly their Queen of Sewage, Chaya Raichik, who should be in a women’s penitentiary trying to explain how she’s not a racist to the brown women in there. Imagine being a “brand” and making money on being a stochastic terrorist, and celebrated for it. I’d actually like to see an IRS audit of Moms for Liberty and their bitch goddess to see where their money is coming from. We really don’t utilize the IRS nearly enough when it comes to lawbreaking cults and psychopaths when they are white, which is completely despicable, but part of those horrific baked-in values of racism in American society, carefully developed and nurtured over four hundred years. When I first saw they were targeting Haitian immigrants, I had two thoughts: 1. I was surprised the old blood libel about Haitians and HIV/AIDS weren’t dug up (it took just another day and 2. since it was pets, I was a little surprised it wasn’t the blood libel of Haitian satanism/voodoo’, i.e “they’re stealing our pets for ritual sacrifice!” Thanks, by the way, to perennial presidential candidate and new age lunatic Marianne Williamson, for making that connection for everyone. She’s fucking trash, and someone else Oprah owes us all an apology for platforming. She actually has quite a track record for charlatans and frauds, doesn’t she?

And on that note I am going to get another cup of coffee and perhaps some coffee cake for breakfast before I head into the spice mines. Have a great day, Constant Reader, and I may be back later, one never can be sure.

Screenshot

Rub It In

Saturday morning of this disrupted and off-track week. I went to the office yesterday and did walk-in testing, primarily because I’d already been home for two days getting paid and didn’t really think it was right to then work-at-home on Friday, too. But it has thrown my routine off, just as the hurricane did, because now my days are all messed up. LSU plays at eleven this morning, which means I should make a grocery run this morning before the game starts, but I also slept late and am not really sure if I have the energy to do so before the game starts. There are also good games on for the majority of the day–which will make that trip even trickier to do later, so i really do need to get to the Fresh Market before hand. Sigh. I didn’t do much when I got home from work, either, as I was very tired; mostly watched the news and cuddled with Sparky until Paul got home–late–and then I went to bed shortly after.

I also have to go to make groceries tomorrow, too. Sigh. The run to the Fresh Market is to get some fresh meat and shrimp for the weekend. I want to barbecue burgers today–a college football Saturday thing–and shrimp scampi or maybe even shrimp creole for tomorrow night. But I need to clean this goddamned godforsaken kitchen first. I have a sink full of dishes that I’ve just let sit there all week (we were supposed to use water sparingly after the storm, because the sewers were full of water already) and of course, now it’s going to be a major undertaking. I let the entire house slide this week, which is shameful. I’m going to work more on the Scotty Bible today while I watch games, try to read some more of Everybody Knows (which is fantastic), and try to pick up around here. Next week isn’t going to be an easy one, as my supervisor will be out at a conference (which basically means everyone will come to me with questions and concerns) so it will be a lot more hectic. Sigh. I have so much to do! I guess today I’ll go ahead and make a to-do list today before I start working on the house.

Ah, there’s the coffee kicking in at last! I was getting worried as I was feeling a bit groggy still, and thought ugh is this going to be a tired day? I fell asleep in the afternoon one day this past week, during the storm days, which was wild, but hurricane fatigue is a thing. Yeah, running over to Fresh Market after finishing this and getting a bit cleaned up before the game is definitely do-able. I want to seriously clean off my desk and organize this area a bit–the great thing is I can play whatever game I’m watching on the computer while I am in the kitchen, which is very cool (something I always forget–that my desktop AND laptop are also television screens).

I also want to get some progress made on the book this weekend. I’m sure the Saints are playing tomorrow, plus the grocery trip (I may go to the West Bank, now that they’re finished installing the lights on the bridge, and may even treat myself to Sonic while I am over there), so the window for writing tomorrow could be a little tight. It’s always hard to write on the weekends during football season! But I’ll get it done. It really is impossible to be able to focus completely to write when there’s a storm on its way, or even immediately after. But the positive is the book itself is set during a storm, and now I have fresh memories of time-lines, what it’s like outside, and the tension. No matter how much you try to relax, you’re always on edge because you never can be certain the roof isn’t going to come off or there won’t be a tornado or the wind won’t pick up a tree and deposit it on your house–sometimes hurricane winds can rip the facade off a house, too. I also need to do some brainstorming on the rest of the book. I’ve got some ideas about how to write the rest, but the primary trick is going to be not using anything that can slow the narrative down–like over-explaining (what I call “filler”), because it really does need to keep moving.

And see? After a tropical weather break, I am getting right back into it again. Huzzah!

And on that note, I am going to get cleaned up and head into the spice mines and get that grocery run out of the way…and perhaps start on cleaning up this kitchen, too. Have a lovely Saturday, Constant Reader; I doubt I’ll be back today but you never know. GEAUX TIGERS!

Help Me Rhonda

Well, I got up late this morning and I don’t feel the least bit sorry or shamed at my sloth-like behavior this morning. I feel rested–I slept very well, thank you very much–and am up for a lovely day today. Bouchercon is in Nashville this upcoming week, and I am sure I will be terribly envious when I see the posts and pictures that will start appearing on my social media soon. It’s also Southern Decadence that same weekend, an odd confluence of things I really (or used to) enjoy. Years ago that would have been a very difficult choice to make; now, I am not doing either.

Sparky is feeling rambunctious this morning; he just tipped the recycling over and if I look over at the can, all I can see is his tail sticking out amidst the clean, rinsed out plastic bottles now scattered over the floor.

I had a good day yesterday. I got my work-at-home duties done, then ran my errands and tried to get the house back under control. I was also a bit lazy about everything, too. Paul stayed at the office late last night so I rewatched some old movies I love (Star Wars, Body Heat) which were as much fun as ever–although I’ll never understand why Body Heat wasn’t nominated for any Oscars, especially for Kathleen Turner (on the other hand, she was only nominated once, which was a crime and a definite oversight, and the film she was nominated for was not one of her best). That was kind of nice, actually; I may watch another movie this afternoon while Paul is off doing whatever it is he does on Saturdays (trainer, gym, office), something old and classic that I’ve never seen; or maybe some wonderful old noir that I’ve already seen, like The Strange Love of Martha Ivers or In a Lonely Place. Both are marvelous, and both are definitely worth watching again.1

Today I am going to run a box of books over to the library sale, pick up the mail, and stop at the Fresh Market to get a few things for the weekend (fresh meat, gourmet jelly beans to which I am now horribly addicted, maybe some veggies),and then tomorrow I am going to go to the gym in the morning and then spend the rest of the day at home. I’ve decided to make groceries on the way home from work on Monday, and I want to read and clean and maybe even write today (madness, right?). I’ve been thinking about the next Scotty, and may start working on that today. I did make a to-do list that I need to check, and I know I wanted to get some of the boxes down from the tops of the cabinets and maybe even a box out of the attic, go through them, and decide what to do with the contents. I also still have a drawer in the filing cabinet to organize–and the entire cabinet needs to be alphabetized; I used to try to separate files by what their purpose was, but I think I am just going to merge it all into one big alphabetized cabinet and be done with it; it will certainly make finding things easier.

And God knows, making things easier to find for me is a definite plus.

And on that note, I think I’ll head into the spice mines. Have a lovely Saturday, Constant Reader, and since my day plans are so amorphous, I may be back later. It depends on how lazy I am feeling today!

  1. Although thinking about Kathleen Turner has me thinking about rewatching Romancing the Stone, which is one of my favorite movies of the 1980s. ↩︎

Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me

Up early on a Sunday, thanks to Sparky. I got up, fed him, and decided to have some coffee and stay up. I got eight hours, did I really need anymore? I thought when you got older you slept less? I don’t know. All I know is I’m able to sleep a lot later than I used to, and sometimes my body feels like it needs more. We’ll see how today goes, and I can always take a nap if my body needs one this afternoon. I am debating whether or not to make a grocery run today or wait till tomorrow to do it. But the coffee is starting to kick in, and I have a lot of chores to get done around here today. I did go get my RSV and flu shots yesterday, ran some errands, and came home to watch more Solar Opposites, which continues to be a hilarious delight. I barbecued for dinner last night, and managed to get to bed earlier than I usually do on a weekend.

I can get everything done this morning and try to get a lot of other chores done before Paul gets up. I started writing a new essay for the Substack yesterday, which counts as writing, and hopefully I can get some more writing done today. I also got the ARC of Alison Gaylin’s January release for next year, We Are Watching, which looks fantastic, so I really do need to get back to actual reading again. I have two days left as a sixty-two year old, so kind of just easing into my sixty-third (although it’s really the sixty-fourth, you aren’t born at age one you’re born at zero; your birthday marks how many years so far you’ve completed). I cannot believe August is nearly half over already, but that means cooler weather is not that far off–and by that, I mean the high seventies, low eighties. That may seem hot to you, Constant Reader, but to give you an example, it’s going to feel like 120 in New Orleans today.

Maybe I’ll stay inside and go make groceries tomorrow. That makes more sense to me. I also have some things being delivered to the apartment today, too, so yeah, maybe I’ll wait and go tomorrow morning. Less people, less traffic, and less aggravation. Maybe I’ll treat myself to Five Guys, too, while I am over there. It’s been a hot minute since I’ve had a good greasy burger, you know? I bought one of those dinner kits from Fresh Market to make for dinner; I don’t remember what, but we really liked the shrimp scampi one we had the last time I got one, and we’ve genuinely liked the others I’ve gotten. So I don’t need to worry about what we’re having for dinner today and there’s no need to get to the store to buy anything. Tomorrow night I think I’ll make salisbury steak and mashed potatoes, to change things up a bit, and then I really only have to go into the office for two days this week. Next week is a full week, but then it’s Labor Day and Southern Decadence. I’m not going down there–too many people, too hot, and I’m too old to stand around all day (which I am really not capable of doing anymore), but I hope that everyone who does has a great time while staying safe at the same time.

Ernesto is still out there heading up the east coast, churning up waves along the shore and it’s either already hit Bermuda, or is very close to doing so. There’s no other systems at this time anywhere in the Atlantic, Gulf of Mexico, or Caribbean Sea1, which is a lovely relief, but we are not out of the woods yet, either.

We had some rain yesterday afternoon, between me running the errands and cooking out, and it was a beauty of a thunderstorm. I’ve always loved thunderstorms, you know, ever since I was a kid. Is there any feeling as marvelous as being in your easy chair, covered up in a blanket reading a good book while there’s a thunderstorm outside? It’s definitely one of my favorite things. Paul and I were watching television when it happened, but Sparky did go to sleep in my lap which was very sweet and endearing for the little demon.

And I think I am going to bring this to a close this morning. I am feeling more awake now, and think I am going to go get cleaned up and get the day moving. I have chores to get done and writing to do, and I am getting a bit hungry. So I may be back later, I may not; it’s a mystery. But may your Sunday be blessed, Constant Reader, and remember to stay positive!

  1. I always spell ‘caribbean’ wrong the first time; I am always certain it only has one b and two r’s. WRONG. ↩︎

Someday Man

Work at home Friday!

I slept really well last night, and even slept a little later this morning than I was expecting to, but I am not going to berate myself over sleeping later than I want/”should”; the new Greg mentality is you slept late because your body needed the sleep and let myself off the hook. Being kinder to myself, along with the new medications, seems to be working. I am not anxious anymore, I don’t get angry–even when I’m driving–and I feel more centered than I have in a very long time. I’m sleeping soundly every night, and while I do tend to get tired in the afternoons at the office, I’m not groggy in the mornings anymore.

A quick look around the news this morning has let me know that the current system being watched by the Hurricane Center will most likely become a tropical depression in the Gulf this weekend, with the cone covering most of the northern Gulf Coast. It will feel like 115 today outside–the dog days of summer are truly upon us now. Football season is rapidly approaching (huzzah!), and soon after the weather will finally start to ease up here. Sha’carri Richardson competes today, and of course, last night the Women’s Gymnastics All Around was quite marvelous, with Simone Biles capturing gold and Suni Lee getting bronze; Rebeca Andrade of Brazil got silver, and the entire competition was exciting down to the last routine. I was also amazed by Andrade’s skills and abilities, and what a beautiful smile she has! Seeing the top three supporting each other and cheering each other one was also fantastic to see; the change in mentality in women’s gymnastics was long overdue. I was so happy and thrilled for them–and I also enjoyed Snoop’s private tour of the Louvre1.

Sigh. I love the Olympics, and become obsessed with them every four years.

I was also, oddly enough, thinking about how cool an Olympic gay rom-com would be last night as I watched, and it occurred to me that maybe I should try writing one? Because, of course, I don’t have a million other things to write when I get the chance, but it’s a fun idea. I really need to work on the book some more, or writing of some kind, any kind, really. I’m getting ideas again– my brain producing characters and stories and scenes and things without, apparently, any rhyme or reason to them. But it feels good to have creative thoughts again, and I need to start turning things into words on the page again. (Hilariously, now that I’ve relieved myself of pressure to write during the Olympics, all I want to do is write. Oy.)

I also need to start reading again. I think I’ll dip my way in again by reading short stories, and since I have some I want to write, perhaps that will inspire me to get back to work on the short stories again. I also need to get better organized (still have NOT made that to-do list). I have a doctor’s appointment after work today, and I might stop at the Fresh Market since I will be right there on the way back. Since it’s going to be so hot outside today, most likely I will not be doing a lot out of the house today. It’s also supposed to rain this afternoon (it’s literally rained every day for weeks), so hopefully I’m not going to get caught up in that, either. Lots of our regular shows have dropped new seasons, also, and we still haven’t finished Evil, and we’re behind on any number of shows airing currently, so once the Olympics are over our entertainment needs will be contained…although we’ll probably watch the games during the day this weekend and watch other stuff at night. We need to finish Evil, too.

Well, sorry for being so tedious this morning! But I am enjoying my coffee, I feel good and awake, and look forward to a productive day. Have a great Friday, I may be back later, and if not, till the morrow, Constant Reader!

Have been a fan of Rafa since he was a teenager. It’s going to be weird not seeing him on the tour anymore. Thanks and best wishes to you for the future, Rafa!
  1. It occurred to me this morning that of course the Right is trying to ruin the Olympics; every single sport shows that white supremacy is a fucking myth. How much do they hate that we have so many racialized athletes that are amongst the best in the world, if not the best? How much do they hate that Snoop and Flavor Flav have become not only national treasures but are winning hearts every time they appear on the television screen? Where are the right wing “celebrities” who are sponsoring athletes or teams? The Olympics rub their faces in their own mediocrity, so of course they have to politicize everything. ↩︎

Porpoise Song

In order to honor the Olympics1, I’ve decided that my “hot man” daily image will be Olympic athletes, mostly present day but also including gorgeous men from past Olympics as well, through the course of these Games. I always loved the Olympics, even as a kid who wasn’t all that interested in team sports–I was always interested in individual sports (probably the introversion caused by the anxiety and ADD) more and the Olympics are nothing if not about the individual sport more so than the team efforts–and naturally, I gravitated to the ones where the athletes either wore very little, or something incredibly skintight. We did get to watch some of the Olympics yesterday, with the swimming relays and so forth, which was terrific and fun.2

It rained most of the day yesterday and as such I didn’t run my errands yesterday. (I’m going to Fresh Market this morning to get some things and will hit the grocery store again on the way home from work on Monday.) I didn’t write yesterday, either. The rain made me lazy, as it always does, but at least I got some of the chores done. We also finished watching the first season of Those About to Die, which was fun if not fully engaging, and certainly entertaining enough on its own. The final season of Elité also dropped, and there are several other things out now that I want to watch (Lady in the Lake being one) but this morning I need to get things picked up around the office space, finish some chores that got started, and then I’ll probably settle in for some Olympic enjoyment. Yay! I do love the Olympics. The first ones I remember are 1972, in Munich–Olga Korbut and Mark Spitz and the murders of the Israeli athletes. (They actually allowed us to watch the coverage of the hostage situation at my junior high because “it’s history.”) Paul and I were laughing about the Christian Nationalist response to them last night, and trying to remember opening ceremonies of the past. Athens and Beijing were the two that stood out the most to me (ironically, Fox News didn’t turn Athens’ celebration of Greece’s pagan past into a boycott, go figure, and the fact they were outraged this year because they were too stupid to understand what they were seeing is all anyone really needs to know about them: they get mad about things they don’t understand–and the French are now laughing at their ignorance). I do need to write today, and after I get this done and the kitchen organized, I am going to settle in to doing just that very thing.

I feel much more awake and alive this morning than I did yesterday, which is a lovely thing. It’s also very bright and sunny outside this morning, as opposed to yesterday’s gloom. I don’t really have to get much at the store today, just something for tonight’s dinner and a few other things, too, so going to the store shouldn’t be a tiring thing for me today. I am also going to make a to-do list this morning, and hopefully, that will keep me on track this week, and getting things done and accomplished. I want to get back into the old routine where I was a determined writer who got a lot done every week. I do have a ridiculous amount of down time now, and it’s taking some getting used to–I still feel guilty when choosing a down day or an evening off, but the book is really the only thing I’m getting behind on, which is also fine, you know? My emails never take long to get caught up on, and it’s so nice to not be buried in emails every fucking hour on the hour. I’ve been on social media a little too much lately–it’s hard to believe that it was only last Sunday afternoon that President Biden dropped out of the race. It seems like it’s been weeks, so much has rapidly changed over the course of this past week, that’s it hard to believe it’s been a mere seven days. It’s also lovely not seeing anything on social media from the pro-fascist mainstream media anymore. I do not miss the New York Times, Washington Post, CNN, or MSNBC3, and will continue to live without them until I am in the grave.

My coffee is hitting perfectly this morning too, and I am so hungry! I didn’t eat a lot yesterday, like a fool, and so of course this morning I am starving. I didn’t really have much to make for dinner, so I had a turkey sandwich and Paul got a frozen pizza for us for dinner, but obviously, that wasn’t filling–as I am finding out this morning.

I spent a lot of time yesterday cleaning up files (partly because my brain was too fogged yesterday so I knew I wouldn’t write) and oh my God, the essay file. SO many essays, so many drafts of them, so many with different names, so many different essays that are thematically the same as so many others. I had to file some new essay drafts yesterday, and that led me to realize how hard those folders were to navigate because of the lack of organization. It’s better now, but still needs some more work–and I also realized yesterday that I can post my old essays on writing and other things on Substack to keep the content going on a weekly basis so I don’t ever have to really worry about coming up with content; there are so fucking many, really. I wrote so many articles and columns, and they are just sitting in my files. There are also so many that I started and never finished, too. I doubt that the fitness ones would ever come in handy for anyone or anything, but the ones about self-esteem and work ethic and mind/body/spirit could work still. I could also rewrite them, because I am sure now I would read them over and cringe.

And maybe take some boxes down from on top of the cabinets. I think one is just filled with other packaging debris, and I kept it in case I wanted to send the vaccum (which I’ve hardly used) back.

And on that note, I need to get something to eat before I shrivel up. Have a great Sunday, and I may be back later. If not, till the morrow, Constant Reader.

Nathan Adrian, past Olympian in swimming
  1. Plus, this title is another shot at trashbag Just Douchey Vance, which will never get old. ↩︎
  2. I would also like to point out that the Olympics are supposed to rise above everything else to celebrate sport and athleticism. I was a little bummed to see an American athlete being mocked yesterday and his bad day celebrated by people on my political side. Sure, I am not a fan of MAGA and love mocking them every chance I get, but we should rise above that nonsense for the Olympics. I’ve always reviled the politicization of the Games, and always will. All that matters is they are repping our country, for better or for worse. ↩︎
  3. MSNBC’s “excitement” over the new ticket–which they think they are responsible for–doesn’t negate the fact that the Democratic resurgence was not what they were trying to do. They were hoping for a repeat of 1968 (also a Chicago convention) which would leave the party in disarray and the door wide open for a MAGA takeover, for their ratings. Fuck them, now and forever. ↩︎

(I’m Not Your) Stepping Stone

Friday and I am working at home today. We’re probably going to be losing our work-at-home day in the near future, so I am going to have to get used to going back to the office five days a week. It’s been a hot minute. I haven’t had five office days since March of 2020, so it’s been over four years. And what a four years that has been. Yeesh. Pre-March of 2020 seems like a different world, doesn’t it? But that’s my entire life, really.

I have come to the conclusion that social media and the news–particularly as it’s being reported by the MSM–has been so infuriating lately that I just can’t with it. I am resigned to the election now and knowing that there are enough people willing to risk it, despite the potential consequences of that risk, but narcissists are incapable of thinking beyond themselves. Idiot pundits and rich white “Democrats” seem to be willing to just toss the election to the fascists without a qualm, because ultimately fascism won’t harm them. I honestly think CNN and MSNBC have decided they’re better off under Project 2025 than under Biden–and it’s those expiring tax cuts doing their thinking for them. I don’t know what else to do, myself. I do not know a single person who voted for Biden in the primaries who has changed their mind; this is entirely a pundit/rich white people issue–you know, less than one thousandth of one thousandth of a single percent of voters.

They learned nothing from 2016 and her emails.

No surprise that rich white straight people are willing to throw the rest of us under the bus because they’re “concerned.” They always put themselves first, which is why you seriously cannot trust anyone in a higher tax bracket. Tax the fuck out of them, since they can’t be trusted to use their extra money in a positive way, ever.

Last night was a bit of a loose one; I didn’t do a whole lot when I got home from work because I was a bit tired and worn out from the excessive heat. It didn’t rain yesterday at all, so it never cooled off, and getting into my car was like getting into a sauna. I didn’t stop anywhere and just came straight home because I wasn’t in the mood to handle cross-town traffic. I’ll go later on to get the mail and stop at the Fresh Market for a few things, and hopefully get some writing done. I think I’ve thought about Chapter Four enough so that I can actually write the damned thing now. I also realized a deadline for a short story I need to write isn’t until December, which is a bit of a relief. We watched The Boys and finished Outer Range, which is just incredibly bizarre–and more like Dark than anything else I’ve already compared it to–and that’s a really high bar to clear. I also plan to finish reading my book this weekend and move on to the next. I also want to get some of these other blog drafts finished before the end of the weekend. I also have chores and cleaning to do around here–the living room looks so nice now, but the workspace still needs some additional work. I also need to figure out meals for the weekend. I think I’m going to just order a pizza tonight or Sunday, but we’re both home at night now, which is awesome, so I am going to start experimenting with meals again.

I also need to clean up the recipe files, and my address book. Those are projects that have been languishing for years, because I will always just shove recipes or scraps of paper with addresses on them, into the folder or file box where they go without concern to organization with a flippant I’ll organize this later but never do. I did get my easy chair area carefully set up so I can use my laptop in my easy chair, and so we will see how that goes.

It’s hard to believe football season is drawing nearer, too. (The laptop set-up in the living room will be surely tested during football season.) And the Olympics! So much has been going on that I keep forgetting that is happening this summer.

And on that note, I am heading into the spice mines. I have ZOOM meetings starting soon, and lots of things to get done for the day job today. Have a lovely Friday, I’ll probably be back later, and if not, I’ll be here tomorrow morning again.

Come Softly to Me

Sunday morning and as predicted, I didn’t get nearly as much done yesterday as I wanted to, but it was mostly about time more than anything else. I picked up the mail and stopped by Fresh Market, but then once I got home…well, there were chores still to be done (still have some more to do this morning) and I never did get around to writing anything besides blog entries yesterday, like a very bad Gregalicious. Today I have no choice, I have to write today…and I also have to drive out to the Apple Store in Metairie, and make groceries, both of which will be tiring. (I knew I’d regret putting that chore off until today, but at least it’s sunny out today; I think it’s going to be a rather lovely day out there.)

Sparky is always a problem for sitting at the computer as he always wants to sit in my chair–he will hang out and be obnoxious (right now he’s sprawled across the desk, his flicking tail brushing the keyboard as he knocks other things off…) and then jump into the chair the minute I get up for more coffee or anything, really. Heavy sigh, the joys of Big Spoiled Kitten Energy.

I did manage to watch Christopher and His Kind yesterday, which is Isherwood’s memoir about his life in Berlin during the rise of the Nazis, and it much more explicit than Isherwood’s earlier fictions about Berlin. During that “Staged Right” about Cabaret I watched the other night, he wrote it in reaction to the movie, to leave the record straight (as it were) about himself and his life; he hated that Cabaret made Brian/Christopher into a bisexual and that Sally was played by Liza Minnelli, when the actual Sally was marginally talented at best. It was an interesting film, but Christopher himself really came across as a bit of an asshole. There was also a lot of explicit sex, and there’s no question in watching this film about what his sexuality was, for sure. Matt Smith is simply stunningly beautiful, and Alexander Draymon as Caspar is just too beautiful for words. The two stories (Cabaret and Christopher and His Kind) are similar to each other, but I’m not really sure if a watcher didn’t know that both came from the same source, those similarities are simply base facts the story grew out of, and you might not even recognize them as the same story. I may need to revisit the books sometime when I have more time…as I recognize that a lot of the revisiting of fiction I talk about is probably never going to happen. But as always, I find rereading something as an easy way to shake off the not-reading mode I’ve been in for so long. We also watched the new BBC adaptation of Agatha Christie’s Murder is Easy yesterday, which we quite enjoyed…although I am waiting for the racists to complain since they cast a Black man in the lead.

So I started rereading Norah Lofts’ The Little Wax Doll yesterday, of which I remember very little of my original read back in junior high school (I read her novels about queens and royal women before moving on to her other novels, which was very definitely an eclectic mix), and find myself enjoying it a lot more than I did when I was twelve–I did enjoy it, but I am certainly seeing it differently some fifty years later. As a kid, I just read Miss Mayfield as a lonely spinster who spent most of her life working in Africa in her colonial “white savior” role with her best friend, who hopes to save enough money to buy a little place she and her “best friend” could retired to; now it’s screaming lesbians at me. The book was originally published in 1960, and of course there are the queer deniers who like to think we never existed in the world before Stonewall. The phenomenon of spinsters sharing a home was just a fact of life, and the British never really inquired much further than that–the British cold politeness.

And on that note, I am going to head into the spice mines. There’s a lot to get done today and I am feeling like I will be able to make some significant progress today. Wish me luck, and I may be back later. Happy Sunday, Constant Reader!

You and I

Sunday morning after a relaxing Saturday in the Lost Apartment. I went by to get the mail and stopped at the Fresh Market, then went back later to CVS to get my booster vaccine for COVID-19 and pick up my post-operative medications (my BASTARD insurance refused to cover the oxycodone, of all things. I hope this surgery costs them a fucking fortune). The games on television weren’t very interesting, frankly, and the only one that had any potential at all turned into a blow-out (Georgia-Tennessee). It was kind of a laid-back bland boring kind of day, which was kind of necessary. The prescription issue–I stopped by CVS on my first trip uptown, but one of my prescriptions wasn’t ready (the one I had already called to approve over the phone) but it turned out the reason they kept not filling it was because the insurance wasn’t paying for it and I had to say, “yes, I will pay out of pocket for it, thank you” which was why I had to go back later in the afternoon–so I figured I may as well make a vaccination appointment for when I do go back. You know me, always trying to be as efficient as possible and to utilize my time more effectively; seriously, I know now it’s an anxiety thing. I never quite understand my anxiety and what triggers it or causes it, or how many coping systems I have engineered over the course of my life to work around it–which turns into compulsive behavior.

I’ve yet to figure out how the obsessive part of me comes from the anxiety, but I am sure I will at some point.

My arm–the one I am having the surgery on–is sore this morning because I figured I might as well get used to that arm hurting and had the booster shot in that arm. I slept deeply and well last night; I went to bed shortly after the LSU game concluded with a 56-14 score with Jayden Daniels tying the school record for most touchdowns in a game (the other was Joe Burrow’s eight against Oklahoma in the 2019 play-offs…but Burrow scored seven in the first half and the eighth on the first drive of the second half before sitting out the rest of the game (LSU could have scored a hundred that day had they been so inclined; that game still boggles my mind that it actually happened–as well as how). If there’s any justice in the world Daniels will win the Heisman Trophy (he is clearly the best player in the country), but welcome to 2023 and college football. An impressive showing against Texas A&M won’t hurt his chances, for sure–but the fact LSU has a terrible defense this year shouldn’t overshadow what he’s accomplished with our offense. As an LSU fan, it boggles my mind that we have one of the best offenses of all-time, and yet our defense–always a point of pride in Tigerland–is one of the worst when our defense has historically always been vastly superior to our offense. We used to lose because the offense couldn’t score; now we lose because our defense is terrible. Even last night at first it looked like “same-old same-old,” with Georgia State scoring on their first two possessions before the defense clicked into gear and they never scored again.

Tulane also won again yesterday. Well done, Green Wave!

I spent some time reading Lou Berney’s Dark Ride yesterday and I am loving this book so much. Hardly, the stoner burnout loser main character, is probably one of my favorite characters I’ve read in quite some time; he resonates with me, especially with his newly awakened sense of right and wrong–which does not, I might add, change anything for his normal circumstances–he’s still a stoner burnout, still gets high as he puzzles his way into figuring out what to do next, and whether he should keep carrying about these random two kids he saw one day that might be victims of physical abuse. He reminds me in some way of a modern day American Don Quixote; I don’t know if that was what Berney was going for, but I can tell you this–he has nailed the voice of this character, and the story itself is quite good–and of course the writing, as always with Berney’s work, is spectacular…and it’s quite inspiring.

It also feels weird knowing I don’t have to go into the office tomorrow. Tomorrow is the last day I have to get everything ready in the apartment before the surgery–laying in supplies and getting everything ready to go for Tuesday. I suspect that I am going to be in some kind of drugged stupor for the first two days at least, and maybe by next weekend I’ll be lucid enough to be able to write a blog post; I don’t know. I suspect yesterday’s low energy was in some ways triggered by the knowledge of the surgery coming along with slight irritation over the prescription issue. But I made my meatballs last night (Paul astutely pointing out that I really make meatball stew rather than meatballs in gravy, and that is a very thin line) and they were very good. I also did some straightening up around here–I was expecting Paul to go work with his trainer and then go to the office for the afternoon, but his trainer canceled on him and he stayed home–moving down to lay on the couch and (hopefully) make a bed for Tug/Sparky; unlike Scooter, Tug’s a little more restless and he’s kind of gotten used to using my lap in the easy chair as his bed–and sure enough, he spent most of the day sleeping in my lap as I lazily scrolled through social media, looked things up on Google, and basically did nothing productive while watching yesterday’s (mostly boring) games. I probably should have watched Kansas-Kansas State, which the Wildcats won in a shoot out 31-24 (when was the last time both teams in the rivalry game had winning records? The futility of the college football teams in the state of Kansas is astonishing, even with KSU turning things around in the last thirty years–they’ve beaten KU fifteen straight times now). I’ll go look at what happened around the country in the sport once I finish writing this and move on to the easy chair to finish Lou’s book so I can write about it later. And I need to do some more blatant self-promotional posts before I wind up not being able to post anything at all for who knows how long?

Heavy sigh.

And on that note, I am taking my coffee and Dark Ride to my easy chair, only to emerge from it to get more coffee until I am finished reading it, and have started my next read, Zig Zag, by J. D. O’Brien. Have a lovely Sunday, Constant Reader, and I’ll probably be back later on today at some point as well….and I just remembered there is no Saints game today, so I have no excuses.