Let’s Go

I like the nightlife, baby!

The Cars’ Candy-O album, for the record, also holds up forty years later.

It’s the Monday of my last infusion, which means I need to get ready and drive out to the farthest extreme of Metairie this morning; I’m not really sure where Metairie ends and Kenner begins in all honesty. I’m going to take my book with me to read for the two hours I am in the chair attached to an IV. Woo-hoo! But this is, as I said, the last one, and I’m kind of glad about that, in all honesty. I am sick of IVs, if I am being completely honest. Everyone at the infusion center is lovely, of course, but…

Sunday was a lovely day around here. I grilled yesterday, and we watched the rest of Wednesday, which is a lot of fun (although I keep thinking of the show as a continuation of the movies from the 90s, which it’s not) and I love that my favorite Wednesday, Christina Ricci, is in the cast. Now they just need to write a part for Joan Cusack! We also started Chief of War with Jason Momoa, which is beautiful–looks like it was filmed on location in Hawaii, although I didn’t know that they have kudzu in Hawaii; I don’t recall ever seeing any when I was there, but apparently they do. Also turns out most of the show was shot in New Zealand, not Hawaii, which is interesting. I also read more deeply into El Dorado Drive, which I am loving (and can’t wait to get back into at the infusion center), and I also worked on my own writing for a while yesterday. I am looking forward to working on it more after the infusion, too. I think I am finally getting back into the swing and rhythms of my own life again at long last–but let’s not hold our breaths, shall we?

There’s a tropical system looking to develop into something major out near to Cabo Verde Islands, but will most likely turn north in the Atlantic (so they are saying) and not come ashore in the US. The season is definitely starting to get amped up, unfortunately. I was thinking more about the Katrina aftermath and writing something for the newsletter about the twenty year remembrance; and I am glad I watched that documentary series last week about the disaster. I think I am ready to talk about it again. I also was thinking about my essay on religion that I want to finally finish for my newsletter–this was from finishing season two of Shiny Happy People–and also recognizing, at last, that I can also write them in parts–which is also something I can do with other essays.

Sometimes I wonder about myself, you know? The reason I even thought about this in the first place was because I was thinking yesterday about writing a serialized novel for my newsletters, which then became duh, you can do this with the essays as well so they aren’t so long. I still am up in the air about the newsletter and what I should use it for…but I also want to be careful about freezing it into something clearly defined because then I get into the old “that’s not what this is for” when the truth is it can be whatever I want it to be and any rules for it are set by ME, which means I am also not bound by any such rule. What am I going to do, punish myself by grounding me from writing it for a while? Posh, what ignorance!

Heavy heaving sigh.

And on that note, I am heading into the spice mines. I may be back later after the infusion–one never can be entirely sure with me–but if not, tomorrow morning for sure. Have a lovely Monday!

All Mixed Up

There are three “disturbances” out in the Atlantic with the potential to develop into tropical systems. None are a threat to the Gulf Coast (at least, not yet), but we are heading into the time where hurricane season is super-busy. This year is also the twenty-year anniversary of Katrina, so I’ll be avoiding all the coverage of that for the most part. Even after twenty years, it’s still hard for me to watch any of that stuff–but maybe this year I should break the power of the PTSD and watch it all. It was such a horrible time, truly…but we did watch that show about Memorial Hospital (Baptist). But twenty years on, maybe it is time to watch some of the coverage that I pointedly ignore every year. I dunno, we’ll see.

Yesterday I felt a little under the weather–stomach again–which had me concerned that I was having a reoccurrence of the colitis, but this morning I feel fine, even well rested for a change. I managed to get a lot done at work yesterday, which was great, and I made groceries on my way home. I was tired when I got home, but I wrote for a very little while before Sparky’s need for attention wore me down and I went to my chair. We watched some more Unspeakable Sins, which is such an amazing rollercoaster ride. More has happened in the seven or eight episodes we’ve watched than happened in an entire season of Melrose Place. Nobody does soapy thrillers quite like the Spanish language production companies. So far, we’ve had a failed blackmail seduction, two kidnappings, one faked death, and several criminal syndicates–and of course, lots of videos of wealthy and prominent people at sex parties. We also have a teenager whose stepfather got him addicted to drugs and abused him.

That is seriously one fucked up family.

We’re finally out of the heat advisories, and the maximum temperature for today is 89…which is low for August but I’ll gladly take it. Rain (gasp) is also in the forecast. The rain is predicted for late this afternoon, around when I’ll be coming home, actually, so no errands tonight for sure. I didn’t want to get up this morning, but…that’s really nothing new on a work day, is it? This is a slow week in the clinic (next week is busy busy busy), which is nice, since we’re having a site visit tomorrow. I think I have everything done that I need to have done for the visit, which was the entire goal for yesterday.

I am feeling good about most everything and am not being critical of myself for not pushing myself harder, you know? I’m also kind of still adjusting to life again, which seems to take longer to do the older I get, and seems more necessary as well more often. This has not been a great decade for me, and I can definitely state that my sixties haven’t been the best so far (I’ve pretty much forgotten the fifties, in all honesty). But the inexorable passing of time continues, as the sand in my hourglass continues to run, and my instincts are telling me to make the most of my time, so…sure, I get the I don’t want to’s still, and of course, the temptation of recharging with Sparky in my lap is always there, but I know I can get the work done when I put my nose to the grindstone.

And on that note, I am heading into the spice mines. Have a great Tuesday, Constant Reader, and I’ll be back tomorrow.

Pour Some Sugar on Me

Thursday and my last day in the office for the week. I slept well again last night–didn’t want to get out from under my pile of blankets this morning, yet again–and we also had an amazing thunderstorm last night. Lightning was very close, the thunder rolled for what seemed like forever, and twice the power fluttered on and off before I went to bed. I had a good day at work yesterday–got a lot done there–and picked up the mail on the way home and there was plenty of it, too. This weather is the return of the system that was supposed to flood us this past weekend; it made a U-turn and basically came back. There’s no flood watch or anything, so it’s not as scary this time around, methinks. I did some chores when I got home before my usual catch-up on the news, and once Paul got home we started watching Untamed. We were on our second episode of the evening when the power blinked out then back on the first time, and it took forever for the wireless server to come back on line–Netflix is always slow to load, too–so we gave up for the evening. We’ll probably finish the show in another night or two, and then will have to find something new to watch again. Huzzah.

I am also still reeling a bit from how much my bi-monthly medication costs (#madness). It’s almost two hundred thousand dollars per year. Granted, that also includes the cost of the injection device that I have to attach to myself every eight weeks (I thought it was four; this is much better on me). It is on its way, and should be arriving sometime Friday at the postal service, so I can pop it into the refrigerator and keep it there until I need it in September. I have to go to the service on Friday anyway; I received the title pages for Double Crossing Van Dine anthology to sign (my co-editors, Donna Andrews and Art Taylor, have already signed them; I’m last to go) for the clothbound edition of the anthology. My story “The Spirit Tree,” is another Alabama story, for the record; yet another return to Corinth County! So one of the things I need to do either tonight or tomorrow morning is sign them.

Apparently I need to watch last night’s episode of South Park? Social media is completely abuzz with clips and general hilarity about this new episode, which targets Dumble-dumb. Something to stream while bonding with my precious Sparky tonight, at any rate. I also need to check my to-do list as well as make a more comprehensive one for the weekend. I have plenty of work to do at home tomorrow, of course, and lots of chores and writing and editing and cleaning to do around that, as always. I am trying to get my email inbox cleaned out, and I also need to do some studying on things. I don’t think I have to sign up for Medicare before I actually retire or stop working, according to what I have read, which is kind of a relief; I’d rather not deal with that frustrating red tape until I actually have to, you know?

Insurance shouldn’t be this crazy and complicated and irritating, frankly.

Neither should life.

I also want to get another newsletter out–either about the recent trend by gymbros to build up a beautiful butt1, or my one about the kids’ series featuring Vicki Barr, (pre-feminist) stewardess! I also owe a gazillion emails…sigh.

And on that note, it’s off to the spice mines with me. Have a lovely Thursday, Constant Reader, and I will be back in the morning.

The Temple of Poseidon
  1. So much of a gym trend that Men’s Health published an article about it! ↩︎

The Main Thing

Work at home Friday, as we head into this weekend. It started sprinkling here around lunch time, and the deluge came after one. It was pouring, but only lasted for about an hour or so–but a lot of water came down. The rest of the day was just gray, with an occasional light sprinkle. My sinuses behaved, surprisingly, and I wasn’t that tired when I left for home. There was no traffic on the highway; I only had to slow down on the ramp to I-10 rather than the usual stop-and-go fifteen minutes it is usually. I guess a lot of people stayed home yesterday…but all of our appointments also showed up, which was nice. Looking at the weather this morning–currently sunny with scattered clouds, potential of rain at any moment until tomorrow–it appears we missed most of the rain yesterday, which wound up west of the city. The Atchafalaya basin got 11 inches of rain (!!!) yesterday instead of us; 11 inches of rain would have shut New Orleans down for the day. I slept very deeply and restfully last night, so I have no idea if we got any rain overnight. I feel pretty good this morning, too. The coffee is going down well, my coffee cake was perfection, and I’ll have either toast or cereal or yogurt as a follow up later. We’re still planning on going to Costco after work today, but that will depend on the rain. I also have dinner plans with a friend, but again–that will depend on the weather.

I did some chores when I got home from work last night–dishes and laundry–but my mind was pretty much mush by the time I was done with that, and then Paul came home while I was catching up on the news (Epstein! Epstein! Epstein!), and we started watching season two of America’s Sweethearts: The Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders–which we used to watch when it aired on TNN as Making the Team. It’s definitely lots of fun; Paul and I are always fascinated by the two women who run the program, Kelly and Judy, who’ve pretty much dedicated their entire lives to the Dallas cheerleader program. (They also belong on a Real Housewives franchise, but are probably too busy.) I’m always fascinated by how these young women are sexualized by that uniform, but the show is always very careful to focus the cameras on the ones who come across as very sweet and virginal–or can play the part for the cameras, at least. I will definitely be talking more about this show!

But we’re on the cusp of another weekend, and I don’t have nearly as many chores to get done as I usually do, so I have a bit of a head start on the weekend; I won’t have to spend tomorrow morning cleaning or doing much of anything around here, so I can focus on reading my current books (Megan Abbott, Elizabeth Peters, Jay Bennett) and write. I’m not sure if the plans for the weekend include seeing Superman, but it’s playing in convenient nearby theaters, so it’s not a huge stretch for us to be able to see it. I’ve been a Superman fan since I was a kid and discovered the comic books and all the other media featuring him; I’ve read books, comic books, watched television shows and movies with him over the years–but I am also not one of those “fans” who feels betrayed by differences in adaptations, either. (Did Archie purists whine about Riverdale?) I’ve always been interested in the concept of super-heroes/metahumans etc., and have wanted to explore it in fiction sometime. But how can you be original when so much has been already done? Sigh. I always feel derivative when I’m writing anything, but that, I suspect, is a part of my imposter syndrome.

I really wish I could analyze the imposter syndrome right out of my brain.

It looks like we aren’t getting much rain today, after all, which will make the day a lot easier to deal with for errands and so forth. Huzzah! (The sun is shining now.)

And on that note, I am going to head into the spice mines. Sorry to be so dull, but that’s just the way it goes some weeks, you know? I will be back tomorrow morning, if not sooner; one never can be sure when the mood will strike! But have a great Friday, Constant Reader!

Steve Reeves in Trojan Horse

True to Life

Thursday! SO, the bills got paid and I ran my errand after work last night, managing to get home before yesterday’s thunderstorms rolled through while I finished watching American Nightmare. I also went to bed early as the thunder boomed and the rain came down. I slept very well, didn’t want to get out of bed, and am looking forward to work-at-home Friday, when I can sleep a little later. I felt pretty good for most of the day but hit a wall around three, which wasn’t a good thing as I didn’t get everything done yesterday that I needed to get done yesterday. There was some question about closing the agency today, but I just checked my work accounts and no update for today. City Hall and all government offices are closed today–which used to be the agency’s benchmark–but it’s also an enormous pain in the ass for the clinic to close. We’re still in a flood watch, too, and the sky looks rather threatening. Oh, well. I imagine we’re not going to be terribly busy today; but…people might keep their appointments as long as the weather isn’t too terrible.

I was going to run errands tonight on the way home, but if streets are flooding–yeah, that’s not going to happen. I think good weather–or at least nothing tropical–will be here on Saturday, so I can run errands and make groceries and do all that fun stuff in the morning. I also need to clean out my email inbox and do some more filing as well as cleaning up around here. It’s very odd that I am waking up more energetic and rarin’ to go later in the week than I was earlier in the week, but I’ve long since stopped trying to understand the weirdness of my physical self and how it reacts to things and changes and every day life. The last time I had an infusion I was really fatigued and out of it the rest of the week; and while I have been getting tired in the late afternoons this week, I am not tired in the mornings and have actually been feeling really good (other than the horror that is

Sparky did let me do some chores last night before climbing up me and roosting on my shoulder, purring and headbutting me, which he only does when he needs some affection and cuddling right now. I will then proceed to my easy chair with him wrapped around my neck like a scarf or a stole, and he will stay there as I carefully sit down and put up the foot rest. Once the foot rest is up, he’ll either curl up in my lap or between my calves and go to sleep, purring. Is there anything more relaxing than a purring kitty in your lap? I think not…and then of course I don’t want to disturb him because he clearly doesn’t get enough sleep, ha ha ha ha. He also slept in the bed with me last night, curled up around my feet. (I suspect he does that because he’ll know immediately when I wake up and can feed him his breakfast.) I am so delighted that he’s become a cuddle-kitty as he’s gotten older; Skittle and Scooter were both cuddlers who loved sleeping on us; Sparky’s reluctance was very disappointing, so yes, it’s joyous now that he loves to–on his own terms and when he is feeling it, that is. I mean, he is still a cat, after all.

Nothing else to report this morning on the State of the Gregalicious, alas. I’m still greatly enjoying the collapse of MAGA over the Epstein files; and am afraid I get far too wrapped up in/sucked into the madness so I can point and laugh, but do I really need to add anything further to the discourse? I am enjoying this, but not getting my hopes up that this will kill MAGA once and for all; I’ve had high hopes before but you can never go wrong overestimating how vile and disgusting his base are and what they are willing to embrace for his sake. Because make no mistake, supporting him now means you are 100% okay with pedophiles, sex trafficking, and rape. Explain that to your God, evangelicals.

And on that note, I am heading into the spice mines. Feel free to send me positive vibes that I won’t have to get home by driving through flood water tonight, and I will see you tomorrow morning.

India

I’ve always wanted to go to India. Now it’s yet another one of those destinations I’ve wanted to visit since I was a child and never got around to seeing. Ah, well. There are worse things.

We’re due for some shitty weather, beginning later on today. We’re in a flood watch until Saturday, and there’s a tropical system heading this way as well. Yay? The office will be monitoring the situation and determining whether or not we should close the office because of the weather. I love the rain, not going to lie, and the thought of being able to read the new Megan Abbott while under a blanket while it rains outside is very appealing.

I just hope we don’t lose power.

It’s Pay-the-Bills Wednesday again, so I’ll have to make some time this morning to do just that. This will be the first paycheck with my raise on it, yay! We were very busy at the office yesterday, with the end result that I was very fatigued by the afternoon and headed straight home after work, collapsing into my chair and providing a comfy bed for a cuddle-bug Sparky. He’s become very attached to me since I got back from Alabama, which is lovely; when I was sick he couldn’t be bothered! But in fairness to him, when I was sick I was also getting up very frequently…I don’t know why he’s become so affectionate, but I also don’t mind it in the least. It’s relaxing to have a purring, sleeping kitty in your lap, isn’t it? I also went to bed around nine. I accomplished nothing last night, but that’s okay. Today won’t be as busy at work, it’ll be raining when I come home, and of course, I am hoping to have a productive evening. What we do this weekend will be tempered by the weather but I am still hopeful we’ll be able to go to Costco and see Superman.

As a cat bed, I spent most of the evening watching news clips on Youtube and doomscrolling social media, which was an utter waste of the night but I was too exhausted/fatigued from the day to do much of anything else. Of course I am trying not to berate myself for having such an unproductive evening, but I was fatigued and too befuddled to do much of anything, so let it go, Gregalicious. I do have a lot to get done, but it’s all dependent on my energy levels. Today I am going to review and revise my to-do list and start working on it. I don’t need to doomscroll social media much anymore–social media really isn’t much fun anymore. I used to interact with people a lot more before the billionaires began showing their evil hands. Facebook is mostly a waste of time with very little interaction, and I don’t use the Twitter replacements nearly as much as how I used to use Twitter back in the day. Now social media is nothing but a waste of time; if I’m not having interactions with friends and fun people, what is the point?

And yet I still go to Facebook a few times per day, mostly to post this blog or a newsletter, but the fun is gone. And was the fun worth the cost? On the one hand, I’m glad I found out some people I know are utter and complete garbage, but on the other, that also makes me a little sad. Social media took the mask off a lot of people, didn’t it? It kind of took the mask off the country, too, for that matter. Before this most recent election, I was always smugly confident that when push came to shove, Americans would always do the right thing and reject bigotry and prejudice. Joke’s on me, right? Sadly, it’s also a joke on the country, which I now think of as a joke myself.

But I feel good and rested this morning, which is always a plus. We’re going to be busier than I thought (the schedule got booked up overnight, or at least since I left yesterday), so I may be fatigued when I get off work and head homeward, but them’s the breaks and when I do get home, I have to do things before I become a cat-bed again.

And on that note, I am heading into the spice mines. Have a lovely Wednesday and I will see you in the morning again…if we don’t wash away over night.

Tears

The infusion went well–but I began running out of steam in the early to late afternoon, and ended up leaving the office earlier than I’d planned to because I was feeling very low energy and fatigue. They did show me a demonstration-model of the device I will be using to give myself infusions (more of an infusion than a shot; it takes five minutes for the medication to be all injected into me), and so I am not as worried about that as I was. I have to attach it to my thigh or my stomach with adhesive (which comes in the kit) and it will let me know when it’s done. Should be interesting, at any rate.

I did take the new Megan Abbott, El Dorado Drive, with me to read during the infusion (two hours), and man, did I ever get sucked into the narrative! Megan’s authorial voice and the rhythm of her language choices are unparalleled–and it again reminded me of why I always leave an unread book by my favorite authors so I know I always have another to read; I am caught up on her (she and Laura Lippman, among a few others, are the only authors I am current on) and I am already dreading the end of this book. She is so sparing with her words, but the ones she uses are always perfect; it is amazing to me how she can describe a room in like an eight-word sentence and you can see it perfectly. I honestly don’t know how she does it; her voice and writing style are so distinctive, but are fresh and new with each book. She already is one of the greats in crime fiction as well as literature, and seriously, every new book from her is a gift to us all.

I was too tired to do much of anything when I got home from work yesterday, getting home before the next round of thunderstorms–which didn’t give me a lot of motivation or energy, actually. I caught up on the news, and we started American Nightmare–I vaguely remember the case when it happened, mostly because of the Gone Girl comparisons–which is interesting, but I started dozing off during the second episode, and I went to bed shortly after nine. I did sleep very well last night, so hopefully the malaise I’ve been experiencing lately will be lifted. It’s going to be a very busy day in the clinic, so here’s hoping I can get through the day and do some writing tonight–with getting to read more of El Dorado Drive as my reward.

There’s also a tropical system moving into the Gulf of MEXICO, which could develop into something of concern later this week (Dexter will be its name, which begs the question why name a storm after a fictional and popular serial killer?) , but at the very least we’ll be getting even more rain, with street flooding. Huzzah, he typed sarcastically. This weekend we need to do the Costco run, and I’d love to head uptown to see Superman at the Prytania; but if we’re getting lots of rain and street flooding, not so sure I want to venture out into inclement weather. I am hoping to get through the week with some energy left over so I don’t fall into the trap of resting and not getting much of anything done over the weekend. I can always write, and of course, the temptation to curl up and finish the Abbott novel will be hard to put off.

There are worse things, of course.

And on that note, I am heading into the spice mines. Have a lovely day, Constant Reader, and I will talk to you again tomorrow morning.

Pharaoh Thutmose III, step-son and successor to Queen Hatshepsut

Puppy Love

Thank God, my sister was never into Donny Osmond or his brothers. But he was everywhere on Top Forty radio in the 1970s, and later he teamed up with Marie–which was actually worse than his solo/with his brother efforts, but for some reason they were enormously popular1, which I never understood. But then I’ve never understood a lot of things that were popular in our culture.2

And “puppy love” is kind of a creepy saying, anyway.

My first infusion is now scheduled, for this coming Monday morning. I am winding down the prednisone; half a pill this week and next, then a quarter pill for the next two, and the massive swelling of my ankles and feet (side effect of the prednisone) has gone down significantly, which is why it is easier for me to walk now than it was before. There was a slight hang-up, of course, with my insurance (I know, gasp) but it got straightened out and the treatments are now approved. For the record, I will never take the word of an insurance company trying to make money for its shareholders about what is or isn’t “medically necessary,” thank you very much. How much of everyone’s time did this waste? How on earth is this considered an effective use of staff time? Our system is so broken. I am getting good care, and I am very grateful for that, but at the same time I shouldn’t have to spend so much time stressing about what is going to be covered and what is not when I am trying to get well. It seems counterproductive to the healing process, but I am not an insurance company employee, so what do I know?

I worked a bit on the story yesterday–broke through the middle and realized what I am writing will need to be restructured in the next draft, but I do like where it’s going–and was also kind of tired by mid-afternoon. I think it was the relaxation from the insurance approval; I hadn’t realized how much that was bothering me under the surface. It also rained all afternoon–marvelous downpours with thunder and lightning, which kind of made me sleepy. I think we’re going to have a very tropical summer this year in New Orleans, where it’s so humid it rains every afternoon. I didn’t read anything when I got home–the traffic on the highways was dense and moving very slow–but just kind of relaxed for a moment before working on the story very briefly. I’m glad I figured it out, though–I was getting a little worried, as I always do when writing doesn’t come as easily as it used to. The story is over two thousand words now, which pleases me; it’s been a hot minute since I wrote that much on anything, so that’s a win, thank you very much.

But it’s Thursday and my last day in the office for the week. The schedule is very light in the clinic today, so I’ll be able to get a lot of Admin work taken care of, which will have me all caught up on the office work before Remote Friday, which will again be admin work, just at home (I save stuff that I can do at home for Remote Fridays), and then it’s the weekend. I should do chores tonight, so I don’t have to do them this weekend, but the house does need to have some picking up and cleaning done. I want to finish writing this story and work on some other writing this weekend, all the while getting the reading done. I should be able to finish my three current reads this weekend before moving on to the next three; I think probably Mia Manansala’s new y/a, along with a Jay Bennett 3reread of one of his y/a’s, and my adult reread will probably be another Barbara Michaels, perhaps The Crying Child, which I’ve not reread in forever.

Those are some really good choices, don’t you think?

I also have some library books for research that I need to get through and make notes so I can return them. One is for Chlorine, and the other is for my deconstruction of Gone with the Wind and Lost Cause mythology–primarily focusing on how the Confederate widows and their daughters drove that mythology (because they couldn’t accept the fact their husbands, fathers and sons were treasonous losers, so they deified them, to the detriment of the country to the present day).

And of course, LSU plays this weekend in the College World Series, so I’ll definitely have that on, too.

And on that note, I am heading into the spice mines. Have a great day, Constant Reader, and I’ll be back tomorrow morning.

  1. I did like his comeback hits in the early 1990’s–“Sacred Emotion” and “Soldier of Love”, though. Go figure. ↩︎
  2. Don’t even get me started on Jonathan Livingston Seagull, which was the Number One bestseller for two full years in the early 1970s. ↩︎
  3. Bennett is mostly forgotten today, but he wrote y/a noir/suspense, won two Edgars from three nominations, and was a master. I’ll probably do a newsletter about him someday, once I get through his entire canon. ↩︎

Papa’s Got a Brand New Bag

Well, yesterday wasn’t so bad, really. The office didn’t burn down in my absence (didn’t think it would) and there was no mess for me to clean up anywhere, so that was nice. I also felt good for most of the day; I had energy and didn’t feel sleepy in the least. I managed to come home from work and get the thing done that needed to be done for today; I also revised and rewrote that short story before discovering the deadline is actually October 20th, so I have time to go over it once again before turning it in for the perusal of the editors. It’s a reach to meet their theme, but nothing ventured and all that. I won’t be disappointed too much if they turn me down. I also have another story to write by the end of the month, and I am not sure which one I have on hand to use for it. Something to look into for this weekend, methinks. And I need to get back to work on Scotty. Heavy sigh.

But I never felt any stress about the deadlines, and I managed to get both things worked on, which I am quite pleased with myself about, frankly. I am rather pleased with the new version of the story; it really does need to be revised one more time (not the least of which is that it’s too long; I always think 5k when writing a story but the CFS for this is 4k max, so some pruning and tightening is in order. I also managed to sleep really well again last night and feel great this morning. I wasn’t tired when I got home, either. After I got through with working, I happily collapsed into my easy chair and caught up on the news. I do think this approach to this year’s election–staying calm and blocking the legacy media1–is the right way to go. I have felt a lot less stressed about everything without losing my shit at the insanity of said legacy media’s insane bias. It doesn’t mean that I’m not worried about the outcome–I am, very much so–but the weight of it all doesn’t need to rest on my shoulders. Thank God for anxiety medications, and the clear-headedness those medications give me.

Today’s goal is to figure out what short story to use for this other call for submissions that is due at the end of the month. I literally have no clue, off the top of my head, and so I am going to have to go through the files and figure out which one I can either finish or revise. A tough problem to have, don’t you think? I kind of want to work on short stories at the moment, which has everything to do with revising one yesterday. Once the dam breaks, and all that stuff and nonsense. I’m just delighted to be writing again, and even more delighted that I am prioritizing my work for once (and from now on). I’ll still do the occasional volunteer thing now and again, but nothing that requires a lengthy commitment or has any urgency; I’ve sacrificed my mental health and my writing for far too long on things that ultimately had no benefit for me other than satisfaction–and sometimes I never even got that, so it’s time for someone else to do whatever it was I thought I was accomplishing. I also have little to no interest in my legacy. I am always amused a bit when I hear writers talk about things like that. For one thing, that’s not for me to decide. Did I make a contribution to American letters? The mystery genre? Queer writing? Most likely not; I am not going to be studied in future college lit courses–genre, for one; gay for the other–and once I’m gone–or stop producing work, I’ll be forgotten, and I am fine with that. The books will all float around on the Internet for years after my death so they are there for the finding. Maybe in a hundred years some scholar will stumble over my work and make a case for me as one of the unsung heroes of crime fiction, but I rather doubt it. In either case, I won’t be here to see it, so why even worry about it? Talk about a waste of energy!

We’re having a cold spell–a front for a few days–where the highs will be in the sixties and the lows in the fifties. It’s fifty-nine right now, brisk and crisp; it will definitely help me sleep and will definitely help bring the power bill down. We resist turning on the heat until it’s actually in the fifties inside, and the heat is far cheaper than air conditioning. I also need to run errands after work today, and then once I am home I need to progress on the apartment before settling into my chair for the evening. I’ve also got to figure out my doctor’s appointments and try to reschedule them all for the same day–or at least to have as many on the same day as possible. Sigh. This is what we call gumbo weather; when you spend the morning in the kitchen making a nice big pot of it–the cooking of it also keeps you warm, and it certainly does warm you up on the inside when you eat it. If the weather holds through the weekend I’ll probably make some kind of shrimp dish–shrimp creole or shrimp scampi or something like that. I also like making potato leek soup and white bean chicken chili (but that will require a Costco trip at some point). I do love the fall here in Louisiana…and it also looks like the two systems the Hurricane Center is monitoring aren’t going to develop into anything for a brief respite.

And on that note, I am heading into the spice mines. Have a lovely day, Constant Reader, and I may be back later; one never really knows for certain, does one?

  1. They have been committing journalistic malpractice since at least 2015, if not longer. ↩︎

Old Man from the Mountain

Tuesday morning and back to the spice mines blog. Huzzah! I feel a bit disoriented this morning, as one always does after even the shortest of trips, and was still pretty tired from the driving yesterday. I ran a few errands and cleaned up the kitchen, doing the dishes and puttering around the house for the most part. I’m still digesting Survivor Song–thinking about dystopian novels and stories–and we watched Outer Banks last night, finishing the first half of the season (all that’s available; the second half will probably drop in a month or do), which is ridiculous and campy and weird and fun, like the first two seasons were (the third was disappointing, really), so I hope that it will continue in this vein and leave the third season in the dust and past. But of course, taking a much-needed rest day has kind of put me behind the eight ball; I have work that’s due tomorrow and I don’t know how much time I will have this evening to try to get everything done as much as possible.

There are also two areas meteorologists are watching for hurricane development–one in the Atlantic, the other in the western Caribbean, off the coast of Central America–so we’re not out of the woods yet; hurricane season after all doesn’t end until December 1. We’re also getting a cold front coming in tonight, which means overnight temperatures in the fifties. Yikes! Practically the dead of winter. But I’ll be coming straight home from work, too, so hopefully the nice weather will hold out until then.

My, I’m exciting this morning. I do feel rested, and I do feel like I can get everything done I need to get done by tomorrow, but it’s still a bit daunting to think ahead and hope I won’t have to work through being tired. I also need to get some work done on the book, and I also need to finish the Scotty Bible; I only have three books left to get the notes from, and then I need to go through the whole thing one last time, and voila! It will be finished. I also need to fix some things in the chapters I’ve already written. I think I shall plan to get everything now finished by the end of the month, so I can spend November getting the rest of the first draft done. That sounds perfectly reasonable to me, actually, and so I think that’s going to be the plan going forward. I need to get this story revised, and I need to revise another for the Bouchercon anthology; I’m thinking I should submit something to it. It’ll depend on any number of other factors, of course; but a reasonable writing schedule should be easy to follow, methinks.

I’ve also been thinking a lot about that wretched professor who told me at seventeen I would never be published as a writer. In my utter obliviousness (part of never looking back, I’m afraid) I never made the connection in my head that it was that experience that derailed my college career and my twenties. I always assumed that it was the entire duality of living two completely separate lives as well as the HIV/AIDS pandemic that sent me spiraling down into a pit from which I didn’t think I’d ever emerge. I never wanted to be anything other than a writer, and being told by a person in authority (I was also always taught to respect authority, and I was only seventeen, so he was a PROFESSOR who KNEW what he was talking about, so if he said it–well, I had to believe it. I had been groomed my entire life to take the voice of authority as gospel and never to question it; so when he said that to me I saw my future yawning open as a life of quiet desperation and misery. I didn’t think I could ever truly be myself, and the only thing that had gotten me through my childhood–the dream of being an author–was ripped away from me. Is it any wonder that what I started basically doing was putting off adulthood? My development was so derailed, which is why I always write off my twenties as the lost decade (although it really carried over for another three years), and just don’t think about it much. But my resentment for that fucking asshole college professor is far deeper and much more powerful now, and I may need to revisit that essay I wrote about his skank ass.

Of course, I am over forty novels and fifty short stories into my professional writing career…and he never published anything. In fact, he was a bitter failed author; the definition of “those who can’t, teach” (which is a horrible phrase, really, that I hate and usually refuse to use, but I have no problem using it on that bottom-feeder) in bright three dimensional living color.

And on that note, I am heading into the spice mines. I hope you have a lovely Tuesday, Constant Reader, and I’ll chat at you later, okay?