Tag: creativity

Alabama Pines

Alabama really is beautiful—it’s not just a slogan on a license plate or the Welcome to Alabama signs.

I am exhausted on Sunday night and about ready to go to bed for the night. Tomorrow we’re picking up my aunt, driving south to pick up another aunt, and then it’s on to Panama City Beach, Florida. I’m only staying until Wednesday morning—have to get back in time to pick up Sparky before heading home and settling into my reality again. I’m not sure why I am so tired, honestly. Maybe it’s residual from the drive and traipsing through graveyards all day. We visited a lot of the graves again today, but mostly stayed out at the graves of my maternal grandparents and my uncle who died young. I barely remember him, but I know when I was a kid I adored him. He was eighteen when he was killed in a car accident, and his funeral is the first one I remember attending. Dad does a lot of this stuff because it was always important to Mom, which is why we spent most of the day with her parents—because that’s what they would do when she was alive, and he sees this as another way of honoring her. I may keep it up on a lesser scale if I outlive Dad; but it would only be for Decoration Day rather than four times a year.

It’s now Thursday morning back in New Orleans; obviously I didn’t finish this while I was away, did I? I drove back yesterday morning without incident, and was pretty tired. My own bed felt marvelous, and I slept like the dead last night, too. Paul had gotten back Tuesday night, and had picked up Sparky from the Cat Practice before I got back to town. I unpacked, washed my clothes, and still have stuff to put away and grocery lists to be made and errands to run and all that jazz. It was a nice break, and it was even nicer to be unplugged from the news for several days. I did catch up on it when I got back–not completely, but at least what’s been going on the last day or so; there’s always so much, and it’s seeming more and more like we keep sliding back on everything as the days pass. Again, I am old, so I am not sure how much longer I have to deal with any of this nonsense’s inevitably bad outcomes.

And people wonder why I never wanted children.

I also had a lot of creativity sparked while I was gone, and I scribbled a lot in my journal yesterday, too. I listened to Alafair Burke’s marvelous The Note (more on that later) during my driving time, and got started on Carol Goodman’s equally wonderful The Sonnet Lover (and in an eerie turn of events, I opened the book on Kindle to scroll to where I had left off, but Audible and Kindle had worked together and communicated somehow so that that was where the book opened. Yikes). I also was remembering a lot, and of course, reminiscing with the previous generation (what’s left of it, anyway) helped with that a lot–which also helped with the creativity flowing. I cracked the shell of another book idea I’ve been wanting to write for several years now, which felt amazing, and yes, I wrote down notes on it as well. (It also helps jog my creativity to read excellent writers, which is another reason I’ve always loved to read so much.) I also had some thoughts about another Scotty book, which is always fun, and I also thought about the book I’m currently writing.

And I really do want to write more about Alabama, too–and the panhandle beach towns.

I have a million things to do today, including figuring out what we need to get in term of groceries and so forth–yesterday was also Pay the Bills Wednesday, so I have to do that this morning, too. I have prescriptions to pick up, and the mail, and…and… and…so much to do. I have to make an appointment for labs to be drawn tomorrow for two doctors as well. I definitely need to make a list. There’s a lot of chores that need to be done around here, too. I also have to update my check register. Sigh. There’s always something, right? The car also behaved marvelously on the drives, which put over a thousand miles on my car. That’s a lot of driving over less than a week, but the books made it a wonderful experience, and of course, Alabama is really gorgeous to drive through.

But I am glad to be back home, glad to be getting back to the normality of every day life, and glad I have a needy cat to sleep in my lap. I am going to try to finish reading the Goodman this weekend, and I am going to try to do some writing in the meantime as well.

And on that note, I am going to head into the spice mines. Have a lovely Friday Eve, everyone, and I’ll be back in the morning. Till then!

There’s no way I’d ever stand there, but this view is magnificent. I believe this is northeast Alabama, but could be wrong.

It Ain’t Me Babe

Ah, it’s Monday and I am up early, swilling coffee and getting ready to face down a very short, and most likely slow, week in the office. Paul is leaving tomorrow for a week, so tomorrow I’ll come home to a quiet, empty house. It’ll be weird, of course,1 but I am going to try to keep busy. I do have a lot of homework2 to get done this week, and hopefully Sparky won’t be near as needy as he always is when it’s just the two of us. Sparky has, at long last, starting sleeping in the bed with us, always in a kitty donut down by my feet, which is very relaxing. He’s been there the last several mornings when I wake up, which is nice. He’s also started cuddling and sleeping with Paul on the couch–like Scooter, Sparky takes turns with our laps when we’re watching television; unlike Scooter, Sparky starts with Paul for a while before curling up in mine for the rest of the evening. It only took just over a year, but we finally have the cuddle bug we wanted. He still only purrs when he’s riding my shoulders, draped around my neck–but he’s getting cuddlier, and there’s more head-butting by the day.

I had a very relaxing day yesterday, but didn’t get nearly as much done as I wanted to–like always. Still reeling from the power of The Reformatory3, I started reading Lavender House by Lev AC Rosen. I am absolutely loving it. I love the voice, I love the main character, I love the writing, and so I know I am going to really love this book–and once I get going, it will be unputdownable. Yay! And there’s two more in this series, too, which is very exciting–not to mention all his other works, in y/a and romance. Paul spent most of the day working upstairs, and leaving me on my own with Sparky for most of the day. I finished my entry on The Reformatory, and worked on some writing, mostly thinking and taking notes. I’m glad this is a short work week, and am looking forward to some lovely down time here by myself. I made progress on the apartment this past weekend, and will probably get some more progress made over this coming long weekend4.

I need to make a to-do list, and to get better organized, but I made progress. I have a manuscript to edit, some short stories to read and judge for Saints and Sinners, and my own writing to work on around here. Sparky will be needy the whole time, and I am going to watch the new season of Heartstopper, before diving into Sex and the City. I’ve also found some movies to watch over the weekend, too–or in the evenings when I get home from work tomorrow and Wednesday. I’ve also got my Housewives shows, and there’s always some cleaning to be done somewhere–not to mention more pruning of the books and the storage attic.

While I was driving around doing my errands Saturday I started listening to Orville Peck’s music on Spotify, and I love it! I have yet to hear a song of his that isn’t a bop, so I saved several of his albums to my library and am going to start listening to him more regularly in the car. I’ve always liked all kinds of genres of music; there just really hasn’t been any country outside of Dolly in a while that I’ve been interested in. I also kind of hate how country music has been taken over by the Right and MAGA–I’ve never forgiven country music for what it did to the Chicks, and they were RIGHT–so I try not to listen to much of the newer stuff. Country music used to be about outlaws and fighting the man holding down the working class, instead of being a bunch of appeasers and collaborators.

They’d shun and cancel Johnny Cash today for being woke. How fucking sad is that?

They must really hate Orville Peck for being openly gay–even though they really embraced Li’l Nas X when he was doing country music back in the day…until he came out and switched genres.

I don’t know what to think about what’s coming, but it’s pretty sad that the only thing standing between us and authoritarianism are the courts, Senate Republicans, and the administration’s utter incompetence. Paul and I have made up our minds to enjoy ourselves as much as possible between now and the transfer of power; who knows what’s coming after that? These are dark times indeed, and a lot of damage can be done by utter incompetence and a program of complete and utter unfettered cruelty. I think the biggest shock for me of the election is that self-absorption and unbridled hatred of anything not straight, white and cishet was actually embraced by the country.

Then again, this is a country that wasn’t able to legislate or vote slavery out of existence, and it took a war. The appeasement of slave-owning Americans from 1787 through 1865 will always be a stain on this nation’s history, and by not dealing with any of it, or systemic racial oppression, by not facing the truth in all its brutal ugliness, we’ve never been able to progress as a racially diverse nation or move on from it. (I always love when Americans take the moral high road when talking to or about other countries; like we have any room to talk about oppressing citizens and human rights violations? Bitch, please.)

Sigh. And on that note I am heading into the spice mines. Have a lovely day, Constant Reader, and I may be back later. One never knows!

  1. I’ll never understand how someone can take up so much space, and how much bigger and emptier it seems when he isn’t there. ↩︎
  2. Writing and reading and editing, oh my! ↩︎
  3. Which might be one of my favorite novels of all time, period, regardless of genre. ↩︎
  4. I am planning on simply cleaning the bathrooms on Thursday morning, and having a very lazy day doing little to nothing other than reading and binge-watching television series; I’ll push myself the other three days. I can also do things at night this week once Paul departs tomorrow morning. ↩︎

You’ve Been So Wonderful To Me

Wednesday morning and hope today is better and there is more energy to be had for me today. Yesterday was a drag, in a lot of ways; I was mentally awake but also physically and intellectually drained, if that makes any sense. It probably doesn’t. The one-two punch of turning in a book one week and a short story less than a week later bracketed around a out of town trip combined to kick my ass. I didn’t want to get up again this morning–I don’t think I will ever hear an alarm and cheerfully sit up, stretch and get up, fully awake and ready to go, once in my life. Which is fine, of course; some of us simply aren’t meant to be wrenched from sleep every morning before we are ready to get up. But I don’t feel as drained this morning as I did yesterday–which is a good sign as the sun rises over the West Bank (don’t ask. tl;dr: “West Bank” means west bank of the river, which doesn’t flow perfectly north and south). I was exhausted when I got off work last night; so exhausted that I couldn’t do much of anything other than watch Youtube documentaries about the Hapsburgs while Scooter purred in my lap. I am hoping (hopeful) that I will not be so tired today, and will be able to get some things done tonight when I get home.

I am very tired of being too tired to read, too.

I do have another story (!) to finish by the end of the month, but I think perhaps the best thing to do this week is let my creative batteries recharge so next week I can dive back into my writing. And yes, I am well aware that this could simply be my deeply engrained subconscious desire to be lazy justifying and excusing not doing any writing this week–but like I said, I am very tired and drained; and I don’t think this is subconscious so much as it is conscious. Parade season looms, and while I know we’ve been planning on skipping what will, for the most part, be a super-spreader event (crowds of people catching things thrown from strangers? No one masked? ) I cannot help but feel that it will be hard to NOT heed the siren song of the marching bands and walk to the corner “just to see.” I really did miss Parade Season last year; I love Carnival every year even as it exasperates and aggravates me at the same time. And I want to write more about Carnival…there’s another Scotty Carnival book in my head somewhere, and there’s the potential new series, too. And short stories! So many potential short stories…I think my creative batteries may be getting some charge stored up in them again, after all.

Huzzah!

It’s nice to start feeling like myself again–whenever the exhaustive malaise sets in, I always worry that this time it might be permanent which, of course, is an absolutely terrifying thought. I wonder if I will ever stop worrying about the ability or desire or need to write going away; I suppose once it finally does, if it ever does, that will be when I can be fairly certain that the end is drawing near. Well, there’s a cheery thought for a Wednesday morning, wasn’t it?

So, I have some clean-up stuff to do with another project this week–I should be finished with that part already, but what can I say? I’ve gotten far behind on everything while I was in “finish the book” mode; as I inevitably do, and of course playing catch-up is not my favorite thing to do–my emails alone are a Sisyphean task–but I am hoping if I can get everything on track this week and over this weekend, next week I can get back to possibly writing and getting organized for what I want to get done for the rest of this year. It’s kind of a surprise that it’s so late in the month already (Valentine’s Day is Monday!) and March is already looming, so I’ve really got to get my act together and start getting things in order. A Greg at rest can no longer stay at rest, no matter how much I want that to happen…and on that note, perhaps it is time for me to head into the spice mines. Have a lovely Hump Day, Constant Reader! Talk to you again tomorrow.