To Turn You On

And today, Paul and I celebrate our thirtieth (gulp) anniversary. YIKES. On August 1, we celebrate moving to New Orleans twenty-nine years ago–and then nineteen days later, I turn sixty-four (cue the Beatles). We are going to a matinee of Superman today–the plans are absolutely definite now–and then we’ll come home and relax. Sparky let me sleep in late this morning, which was much appreciated, and now I am awake and drinking coffee and being a bit reflective.

I had a nice day yesterday. I ran my errands and got home again in less than an hour; and I got a lot of the chores done. There’s still some things that need to be done today, but that’s okay. My kitchen sink and dishwasher are empty and the counters are clear. The laundry is all finished and put away, too. There’s still some things I need to get done today, but that’s okay. I didn’t really read anything yesterday other than things I’ve written–short stories and the Chlorine manuscript–in preparation to get to work on all of these things this week. I feel good this morning, good and rested, so I feel like I am going to be able to get some stuff done today before getting cleaned up and heading out for the movie. It’s gorgeous outside today–the sky is blue and the sun is shining, which probably means it’s in the nineties and feels like over a hundred; we’re going into heat advisories this week, too.

We are in what they used to call the dog days of summer–although I have no idea where that phrase actually came from.

We also finished America’s Sweethearts yesterday–and was very glad to see that the cheerleaders got their raise, and a significant one at that. I’ve always thought, based on the success of their branding over the last fifty years, that they were underpaid and very taken advantage of by the Cowboys organization. It’s a full time job, and they give up a lot of control over their own lives by dreaming to put on that barely-more-than-a-bikini uniform. I’d love to know how the cheerleaders were manifested into what they are today–a brand recognized worldwide, and how the decision was made to to pick those costumes and how they are handled and the rules they live by were developed. I know it happened in the 1970s; I wasn’t really much of a fan because I thought they were being overly sexualized to appeal to the male audience. The one takeaway from watching the show when it was originally on TNN was how the cheerleaders were depicted in that classic Madonna/whore thing: they wear revealing costumes that emphasize their bodies, yet they are all young women who seem to be very chaste and virginal, even the ones that are married or have boyfriends…which always struck me as a bit exploitative.

The two women who run the team, Kelli Finglass and Judy Trammell, are blunt to the point of being rude bitches at time, and the depth of their devotion (each have spent over forty years with the team) to the high standards they want for their performers is kind of impressive, if sometimes over the top (I do find myself thinking from time to time while viewing, “that was just rude” or “Kelli, you could have been a bit more diplomatic there”) and there are some interesting gender politics at play with the show, too–the women are all dressed and made-up to draw the male gaze, yet behind the scenes they are very sweet and supportive of each other to the point that someone cynical (like me) has to wonder how much of it is an act for the cameras. I mean, there’s no conflict between the girls, no personality clashes? But it’s also refreshing–after years of watching reality television and drama manufactured for the cameras for ratings so women can scream at each other–to see women’s relationships depicted as a sisterhood, like a sorority; and sometimes how the group reacts to things looks very sorority-minded. It’s kind of nice to see, actually; women supporting women.

And while I wonder about disordered eating and body dysmorphia for them, based on the pressures placed on them to remain slim yet voluptuous, my favorite quote from Kelli is her saying bluntly to one hopeful at training camp, “The uniform is very unforgiving.”

She wasn’t lying.

And on that note, I am heading into the spice mines. Have a lovely Sunday, Constant Reader, and I’ll be back tomorrow morning.

Avalon

Many years ago, Anya Seton published a terrific historical novel set in pre-1066 England and titled Avalon. The title was a throwback to the female lead character’s bloodline; she was descended from King Arthur and thus part of the English royal family. I loved Anya Seton (Green Darkness remains one of my favorite books to this day)–it’s been a while since I’ve revisited her work, but maybe I should…her books are soooo long, though! Anyway, Avalon is an island from the Arthur mythology…I suppose this is where I admit I’ve never read anything about King Arthur other than the Mary Stewart novels, but I enjoyed those so much I never really felt much of a need to read anything else Arthurian1. For those of you who missed the 1980s, Roxy Music recorded an album titled Avalon, and the title song was gorgeous…as is the entire album, which I’ve been listening to lately. It still, for the record, holds up.

The tropical system turned out to be not much of anything here in New Orleans, but it was rough where it did rain and flood. Yesterday–which was supposed to be the worst of it–was gorgeous for most of the day. After work, we did go to Costco and then I had dinner with a good friend at Saba, which was lovely. My Lyft drivers in both directions were pretty great, too–which was very lovely. The meal was terrific, and I allowed myself a single cocktail–A Dionysus Revival, which was an interesting mix of tequila, cucumber, and mild ancho chili; it was delicious. I also did chores yesterday around working, and the kitchen–which still needs some work–looks so much better this morning than it did yesterday morning, and that makes me very happy this morning. NO DISHES!

I hope to have a good day today, I have some errands to run around noon (mail, make a little groceries), but other than that I am home for the day. We’ll probably watch some more of America’s Sweethearts later, too. I’m not entirely sure why this show fascinates us both so much–there’s definitely a camp quality to it–but it just sucks us in every time we start watching. We, of course, are old school–we used to watch this on TNN when it was called Making the Team, and you can tell Netflix spends more money on the show than TNN ever did. My coffee is tasting marvelous this morning, Sparky let me sleep a little later than usual, and I feel very good this morning. My sinuses are behaving and I don’t have the headache that’s plagued me for the last couple of weeks. I’m also going to spend some time with the new Megan Abbott and my other current reads. Tomorrow we are going to go see Superman, which I am absolutely looking forward to seeing. Reader, there will be a newsletter about my almost life-long love of the character.

I am also hoping to get some writing done today as well. It’s about time for me to get back in the saddle again–and every day that passes when I don’t climb up on that horse again is time slipping through my fingers. It’s creeping up on football season, too–which is going to make it harder to be productive on the weekends, like it always does. I need to clean off my desk and do the floors here in the kitchen, which will be my housework for the day; and I’ll pick up in the living room later on.

Such an exciting life I lead, right?

And on that note, I am heading into the spice mines. Have a lovely Saturday, Constant Reader, and I will check in with you again tomorrow morning.

  1. I did watch Camelot–we saw it in the theater when I was really young. I tried rewatching it during the pandemic, but couldn’t get through it. I’ll never understand why they didn’t cast Julie Andrews as Guinevere, since she’d played it on stage. ↩︎

True to Life

Thursday! SO, the bills got paid and I ran my errand after work last night, managing to get home before yesterday’s thunderstorms rolled through while I finished watching American Nightmare. I also went to bed early as the thunder boomed and the rain came down. I slept very well, didn’t want to get out of bed, and am looking forward to work-at-home Friday, when I can sleep a little later. I felt pretty good for most of the day but hit a wall around three, which wasn’t a good thing as I didn’t get everything done yesterday that I needed to get done yesterday. There was some question about closing the agency today, but I just checked my work accounts and no update for today. City Hall and all government offices are closed today–which used to be the agency’s benchmark–but it’s also an enormous pain in the ass for the clinic to close. We’re still in a flood watch, too, and the sky looks rather threatening. Oh, well. I imagine we’re not going to be terribly busy today; but…people might keep their appointments as long as the weather isn’t too terrible.

I was going to run errands tonight on the way home, but if streets are flooding–yeah, that’s not going to happen. I think good weather–or at least nothing tropical–will be here on Saturday, so I can run errands and make groceries and do all that fun stuff in the morning. I also need to clean out my email inbox and do some more filing as well as cleaning up around here. It’s very odd that I am waking up more energetic and rarin’ to go later in the week than I was earlier in the week, but I’ve long since stopped trying to understand the weirdness of my physical self and how it reacts to things and changes and every day life. The last time I had an infusion I was really fatigued and out of it the rest of the week; and while I have been getting tired in the late afternoons this week, I am not tired in the mornings and have actually been feeling really good (other than the horror that is

Sparky did let me do some chores last night before climbing up me and roosting on my shoulder, purring and headbutting me, which he only does when he needs some affection and cuddling right now. I will then proceed to my easy chair with him wrapped around my neck like a scarf or a stole, and he will stay there as I carefully sit down and put up the foot rest. Once the foot rest is up, he’ll either curl up in my lap or between my calves and go to sleep, purring. Is there anything more relaxing than a purring kitty in your lap? I think not…and then of course I don’t want to disturb him because he clearly doesn’t get enough sleep, ha ha ha ha. He also slept in the bed with me last night, curled up around my feet. (I suspect he does that because he’ll know immediately when I wake up and can feed him his breakfast.) I am so delighted that he’s become a cuddle-kitty as he’s gotten older; Skittle and Scooter were both cuddlers who loved sleeping on us; Sparky’s reluctance was very disappointing, so yes, it’s joyous now that he loves to–on his own terms and when he is feeling it, that is. I mean, he is still a cat, after all.

Nothing else to report this morning on the State of the Gregalicious, alas. I’m still greatly enjoying the collapse of MAGA over the Epstein files; and am afraid I get far too wrapped up in/sucked into the madness so I can point and laugh, but do I really need to add anything further to the discourse? I am enjoying this, but not getting my hopes up that this will kill MAGA once and for all; I’ve had high hopes before but you can never go wrong overestimating how vile and disgusting his base are and what they are willing to embrace for his sake. Because make no mistake, supporting him now means you are 100% okay with pedophiles, sex trafficking, and rape. Explain that to your God, evangelicals.

And on that note, I am heading into the spice mines. Feel free to send me positive vibes that I won’t have to get home by driving through flood water tonight, and I will see you tomorrow morning.

India

I’ve always wanted to go to India. Now it’s yet another one of those destinations I’ve wanted to visit since I was a child and never got around to seeing. Ah, well. There are worse things.

We’re due for some shitty weather, beginning later on today. We’re in a flood watch until Saturday, and there’s a tropical system heading this way as well. Yay? The office will be monitoring the situation and determining whether or not we should close the office because of the weather. I love the rain, not going to lie, and the thought of being able to read the new Megan Abbott while under a blanket while it rains outside is very appealing.

I just hope we don’t lose power.

It’s Pay-the-Bills Wednesday again, so I’ll have to make some time this morning to do just that. This will be the first paycheck with my raise on it, yay! We were very busy at the office yesterday, with the end result that I was very fatigued by the afternoon and headed straight home after work, collapsing into my chair and providing a comfy bed for a cuddle-bug Sparky. He’s become very attached to me since I got back from Alabama, which is lovely; when I was sick he couldn’t be bothered! But in fairness to him, when I was sick I was also getting up very frequently…I don’t know why he’s become so affectionate, but I also don’t mind it in the least. It’s relaxing to have a purring, sleeping kitty in your lap, isn’t it? I also went to bed around nine. I accomplished nothing last night, but that’s okay. Today won’t be as busy at work, it’ll be raining when I come home, and of course, I am hoping to have a productive evening. What we do this weekend will be tempered by the weather but I am still hopeful we’ll be able to go to Costco and see Superman.

As a cat bed, I spent most of the evening watching news clips on Youtube and doomscrolling social media, which was an utter waste of the night but I was too exhausted/fatigued from the day to do much of anything else. Of course I am trying not to berate myself for having such an unproductive evening, but I was fatigued and too befuddled to do much of anything, so let it go, Gregalicious. I do have a lot to get done, but it’s all dependent on my energy levels. Today I am going to review and revise my to-do list and start working on it. I don’t need to doomscroll social media much anymore–social media really isn’t much fun anymore. I used to interact with people a lot more before the billionaires began showing their evil hands. Facebook is mostly a waste of time with very little interaction, and I don’t use the Twitter replacements nearly as much as how I used to use Twitter back in the day. Now social media is nothing but a waste of time; if I’m not having interactions with friends and fun people, what is the point?

And yet I still go to Facebook a few times per day, mostly to post this blog or a newsletter, but the fun is gone. And was the fun worth the cost? On the one hand, I’m glad I found out some people I know are utter and complete garbage, but on the other, that also makes me a little sad. Social media took the mask off a lot of people, didn’t it? It kind of took the mask off the country, too, for that matter. Before this most recent election, I was always smugly confident that when push came to shove, Americans would always do the right thing and reject bigotry and prejudice. Joke’s on me, right? Sadly, it’s also a joke on the country, which I now think of as a joke myself.

But I feel good and rested this morning, which is always a plus. We’re going to be busier than I thought (the schedule got booked up overnight, or at least since I left yesterday), so I may be fatigued when I get off work and head homeward, but them’s the breaks and when I do get home, I have to do things before I become a cat-bed again.

And on that note, I am heading into the spice mines. Have a lovely Wednesday and I will see you in the morning again…if we don’t wash away over night.

While My Heart is Still Beating

Sunday morning and my headache is back. Paul had Aleve on hand (I was out) and that made the headache and stiff neck go away yesterday; I will definitely be taking some more in a moment as well as having some in the groceries I am having delivered later on today. Yesterday was another lazy day in which I did very little, as I spent yesterday afternoon’s massive thunderstorm getting caught up on the Epstein files scandal. I’m kind of impressed that this is what it took to turn MAGA–and they aren’t all completely turned, either; they are roasting Pam Bondi (who has been notorious garbage since her service as Attorney General of Florida–the multi-divorced hypocrite fought same-sex marriage as much as she could with her limited brain) and many are still focusing their rage on her rather than her boss–does anyone believe Bondi wouldn’t release it all if her foul lord and master told her to? Therefore, it stands to reason that the monster is the one telling her not to; and why would that be? I can absolutely believe the Biden administration did not release it all–not to protect Democrats, but to avoid the accusations of political partisanship that would have rung out from Mar-a-Lago, Fox, and Newsmax like a clarion bell.

I mean, that does sound like the way the Democratic Party thinks and operates, doesn’t it? Putting country (and in some cases, donors–looking at you, Fetterman) first and ahead of party is very much a Democratic thing, which could be why they lose so much. If Biden believed releasing the information wouldn’t be good for the country, he wouldn’t release it, period. (Not to going to lie, the Democratic Party has disappointed me time and again throughout my life–but I keep voting for them because at least they finally came around on queer rights. And no, #notallDemocrats, but at least they aren’t trying to take our rights away actively, the way MAGA is.

By the time the thunderstorms passed, I was worn out emotionally from the rollercoaster of getting caught up on the news, and not really in the mood to do much of anything. I spent the rest of the evening researching history for current projects, and then we watched more of Too Much. I have to say I am really impressed with Megan Stalter’s performance as the main character; it’s a completely different character than she plays on Hacks, and she really is convincing. The last episode we watched, which explores the relationship she had that ended badly, and is why she moved to London, was heartbreaking, and that was entirely due to her performance.

I didn’t even read anything yesterday. I never unloaded the dishwasher, we didn’t go to Costco, we didn’t go see Superman (which is getting RAVE reviews everywhere, which makes me happy as I have always been a Superman stan), and nothing much is different about the house from yesterday morning. Sigh. I was thinking about making a grocery run, but think I may just have stuff delivered and pick up other stuff on the way home tomorrow. I also have an infusion tomorrow morning (Part II) so I get to sleep a little later in the morning, too. I’m hoping I won’t be as dog-tired and fatigued as I was after the first one, but…it remains to be seen. I do wonder if the lackadaisical way I felt all last week, and the low energy, was from not taking the steroid anymore. I may ask about that tomorrow at the infusion center.

Other than the headache, though, I feel pretty good this morning. Once I finish this I am going to run upstairs and take some Aleve to knock out this headache, and then I am going to make a grocery list for ordering. I am going to do my chores this morning–no need to get caught up on the news, since I did so much of that shit yesterday–and then I am going to try to get the kitchen and living room under some kind of control, some semblance of order before reading and writing. The Wimbledon men’s final is this morning, but I don’t think I’ll turn that on–as it is too easy to get sucked into the television and then sit there for the rest of the day; not going to lie, Sparky used me as a bed while I watched the news yesterday and I never want to disturb him when he’s being a love bug. He’s so sweet and adorable when he’s affectionate like that–which is why I wound up doing nothing but bonding with my cat.

And I know if I sit in my chair again, he’ll crawl up into my lap and go to sleep today, too.

My test results from Friday are back, and all seem to be okay as best as I can tell. The X-ray showed nothing wrong with my hip, but there’s a reason why my left thigh feels numb, right? We just have to figure out what is causing it. It’s not like it’s life-threatening or anything–but…I am immunocompromised now, and I am not entirely sure what all that means, or how it will affect me physically. I guess I should find out at some point, right?

And on that note, I am going to head upstairs and grab some Aleve. I am also hungry, so am going to have to make something else to eat this morning….nice that my appetite, absent for the last few days, is back again. Have a lovely Sunday, sorry about the political chatter, and I will be back tomorrow morning or even perhaps later!

The Martyrdom of St. Denis

No Way Out

Work at home Friday, and I’ve already gotten my bloodwork done and my X-rays taken. It was amazingly easy and took very little time. I drove over to Touro this morning and was out of Quest Labs by 8:10, after which I took the pedestrian bridge across the street to Touro Hospital, and was all X-rayed and back in my car by 8:30 and home by 8:35! It all went so easily and quickly I never had a chance to open the book I brought with me–Megan Abbott’s El Dorado Drive–so that will have to wait until I take a break at some point today. I am very excited to have a new Megan Abbott to read; I’ve been a huge fan since I read Bury Me Deep for an award over fifteen years ago, I think? I have now read all of her works, and so always anxiously await the arrival of a new one. I think we’re going to Costco when I finish my work today, and this weekend we’ll be seeing Superman–the MAGA outrage only serving to whet my appetite for the film all the more. The apartment is, of course, it’s usual disaster area this morning, but the dishwasher is running and I’m about to start the laundry. Getting there!

I also need to get back on my writing horse. The headache (which I still have) this week has been highly annoying and has interfered with most of my intellectual pursuits this week, which truly sucks. I still get new ideas all the time–that curse will carry me to the grave, methinks–but I’m struggling to actually get writing done. This is what happens when you fall off the wagon and don’t write for a while; you get out of practice–at least I do, and it’s hard to get back into that groove again, which kind of sucks. I am hoping that this weekend will do the trick for me. I don’t feel tired this morning (just the damned headache), and actually feel pretty awake, so maybe today will be a good day.

I was groggy most of yesterday at work–that Thursday malaise–and made groceries on my way home from the office AND picked up the mail. Sparky was pretty needy and I was tired by the time I got home, so I just sat in my chair getting caught up on the news–always a depressing slog–until Paul got home. We finished MurderBot last night, and was sorry to see it end, frankly. Would I find Alexander Skarsgard as charming and likable if he wasn’t gorgeous? But the actor and character are certainly perfectly matched, and when I looked it up last night the show has been renewed for a second season, which could be difficult to pull off–given the finale of the first season. We’ll give it a go, of course–the one thing I prefer about Apple+ to Prime and Netflix is they give shows more than one season.

I wish they’d bring The Morning Show back for another season.

And football season looms just over the horizon, too.

And the demon cat has grown bored with attacking me and has disappeared. *Whew*, now I can get some things done without getting bitten and clawed. (He’s just playing, I know, but that doesn’t make the teeth or claws any less sharp and skin-piercing!) I feel pretty good–the coffee is hitting the spot and my breakfast is going down well. I’m not as hungry as I was since getting out of the hospital, so maybe my body is settling back into being what it normally was. I’ve not had dinner–or had any desire for it–since Monday night; which was also the last day I was on the steroid. Maybe the headache is steroid withdrawal? It could be.

And on that note, I am heading into the spice mines. Have a lovely Friday, and I’ll be back either tonight or tomorrow morning.

The Space Between

Thursday morning and still suffering from my sinuses. Bloody hell! Yesterday the headache plagued me for most of the day, and of course the air conditioning in the office made me want to curl up and sleep after yesterday’s thunderstorm. It’s going to rain for most of the day today, and so I’ll run my errands in the rain today after work. At least we made it to Thursday, right? Tomorrow morning I have to get up and get bloodwork done as well as get my left hip X-rayed; I’m not sure if I have told you about that already, Constant Reader, and don’t want to bore you with information I’ve shared previously, but…when I was sick, I would lose my balance and start to fall–unexpectedly and at any time. Walking out to get a delivery, I lost my balance and fell sideways into the fence. My leg bothered me after that, but I just assumed I had bruised it. Before I saw my primary care doctor I realized that my leg still felt bruised, but it should have healed. I also realized that what I thought was bruising was actually numbness, so I am getting my hip X-rayed to see if it’s a pinched nerve or something else.

Here’s hoping it doesn’t involve another surgery. Christ.

We finished watching We Were Liars and I must confess to some disappointment with the show’s “big twist,” which sort of explained some of the issues I was having with the plot, but…yeah. It also opened up even more questions–things were mentioned during the season, but never explained later. I suppose the ending left a second season as a possibility–which would also account for not wrapping up some of those subplots–but I don’t know if we’re onboard with more of the show, honestly. I can’t explain my disappointment without giving spoilers, and I don’t want to ever do that, in case you may want to watch. Maybe you’ll enjoy it and not see the problems we noted while watching.

Again, last night, when I got home I didn’t do much of anything. I tried to edit and revise for a while but it really was like pulling teeth so I finally gave up and sat in my chair with Sparky. I didn’t do any of the chores I needed to do last night, so I will have to do them when I get home tonight. (I’ll have to ignore Sparky’s pleas to sit in my easy chair–not easy because he is very spoiled and used to getting what he wants.) I think maybe this week my body is getting used to not taking the steroid every morning. I’ve noticed also that I am not that hungry as I was and am not eating as much as I was just last week. It could also be that my body thinks it’s reached the proper weight for me, so is signaling I don’t need to eat more. I don’t know. I just know that the last couple of days I’ve not eaten as much breakfast or lunch as I did last week, and I’ve not eaten anything for dinner either day. It can’t be coincidence that my appetite disappeared as soon as I stopped taking the prednisone, can it? The weight gain seems to have tapered off a bit; I weighed two pounds more this morning than I did last week, which is always within the margin of error because of water weight. (Most people’s weight fluctuates up and down in the range of three pounds either way.)

I feel good this morning–the sinus headache is still there and may not be going away any time soon; it may not be sinus related, either. I noticed this morning that my neck is a little stiff (it has been all week), and when I move my head a certain way, I am aware of the stiffness AND the headache. The headache itself isn’t constant; I only feel it every few seconds and it feels like a sharp object is being stuck in my head on the top but just behind the ear. It may be related to the neck stiffness.

Sigh. Being old really sucks sometimes.

But as we head into my work-at-home day and the weekend, I am hoping to be able to get a lot done (don’t I always?). I know we are going to go see Superman (the MAGA boycott only makes the film more appealing to me) this weekend, and I’ll need to do some things–like wash the car and make groceries–so I am hoping it will be a good weekend.

There’s always hope.

And on that note, I am heading into the spice mines. Have a lovely Friday Eve, Constant Reader, and I’ll be back tomorrow, probably after the blood draw and so forth. We’ll see how it goes.

Former collegiate wrestler and now a fitness influencer @wrestle.chris on Instagram–there may even be an OnlyFans, tooI just checked and yes, there are links on his Insta to OnlyFans.

Noticeable One

Saturday morning, although all day yesterday I kept thinking it was Saturday. I much prefer Monday holidays, for that very reason, over Friday ones. We didn’t go see the movie yesterday, because my sinuses (sinii?) refused to cooperate and were kind of a pain in my ass all day; making me tired and a little grumpy and giving me the occasional headache. This was highly annoying, needless to say, and so I spent the day (other than doing chores) reading and watching television. I am almost finished with Summerhouse–there was a delightful twist two-thirds of the way through that I didn’t see coming, and it’s changed almost everything about the book–and should finish the remaining thirty or so pages this morning. We might go see the movie today–I’m not sure what Paul’s doing; he may be seeing his trainer. I may order some groceries for delivery (again, depends on what Paul is doing) and I was thinking about washing and cleaning out the car today if it’s not super miserable outside.

We watched a gay show through Prime last night, Single Out, which was adorable and cute. There are two more seasons, but alas, we need to either rent them or subscribe to Here–which might not be a bad thing for a little while; get some good gay content to watch–and then we watched Sinners, which is now streaming on MAX. I really enjoyed it, and thought it was excellent. If it weren’t for the fact that it’s a horror film, I’d say it would get a lot of Oscar nominations, but the voting members of the Academy generally don’t take horror very seriously as art, and there’s also some racism there, too. I may be pleasantly surprised, but the production values–set design, costume design, cinematography, screenplay–were all exceptional, and of course, the acting was stellar as well. I highly recommend Sinners, and I may watch it again to catch things I may have missed the first time around.

I feel better this morning than I did yesterday morning, which is nice. I was kind of worn down by the week, and of course the sinus revolt wasn’t much help in that regard, either. But I did make progress on the house, which is always a good thing, even if I didn’t get everything done. I should be able to get everything under control today. My coffee is hitting perfectly, I’m enjoying my breakfast, and his Majesty Sparky Lord of the Apartment isn’t demanding my desk chair for his morning nap, so…that’s a pretty good thing. In fact, when I finish and post this, I may go finish Summerhouse, and read some more of my other two current reads before getting cleaned up and back to work on the house. The dishwasher needs unloading, and there are some other dishes from last night that need to be cleaned–but at least all the laundry is done. Huzzah!

Okay, I was looking at Here’s website, and maybe a few months of paying for a subscription might be worth it (they have Dante’s Cove, which I would love to write about), so maybe we can finish Single Out (the best way to describe it is Heartstopper only with sex and teenagers being horny all the time, yet incredibly sweet and charming at the same time) and watch some classic queer movies, and try out some of their original queer series. Could be fun.

I was also looking through the drafts for my newsletter and sheesh, there’s a LOT I’ve started and not finished, as well as any number of finished entries I didn’t want to publish because it was Pride Month. As for the newsletter’s “identity crisis” I was experiencing last week, well, I think I am going to keep it as is; primarily focusing on queer rights (or the queer American experience), while also doing longer reviews of art (books, movies, TV shows) and perhaps, just perhaps, about writing and publishing. I have a shit ton of columns about writing (and fitness, for that matter) that I could republish in the newsletter (actually, now that I am thinking about it, that was the intent behind this blog in the first place; giving me a place to write about things no one would pay me to write about), and that could also be helpful.

It also occurred to me yesterday that I often shy away from writing more in depth about art because I feel like I am not educated enough to delve more deeply into them–and I also worry that anything I might come up with along those lines might not be original and may have been written about extensively already. But…it’s all opinion in the first place, isn’t it, and yes, maybe I haven’t read all the “classics” or the “modern literary writers,” but do I really need to do that in order to express what my takeaway from experiencing art is? No, I don’t. My takeaway might be better informed if I were more trained in criticism and had I read all those books, but the truth is, I didn’t. Most literary fiction, whether classic or modern, is like any other genre of literature–some is excellent, some is okay, and some is just fucking garbage. I really need to let go of my imposter syndrome once and for all, don’t I?

And on that note, I am going to make another cup of coffee and head to my easy chair. Have a lovely Saturday, and I may be back later. One can never be entirely certain, can one?

It Ain’t None of Your Business

I woke up this morning with congestion and post nasal drip, which isn’t much fun. It’s been a while since I’ve had sinus issues, and it occurs to me that this bout might have something to do with my compromised immune system. Great! Another lovely side effect of my illness and its treatment…but of course, as always, it could be worse. (Theorem: bad situations can always be worse.) The Flonase is kicking in now, and I feel a lot better already. My coffee is delicious, and the coffee cake is quite tasty (chocolate marble swirl, if you must know(

I was tired when I got home from work, but I had a very productive day at the office and managed to get everything done that needed to be done for the end of the fiscal year. (Much worse for my supervisor than for me, and I do try to make it easier for her, but there’s only so much I can do.) She’s on vacation next week, which leaves me in charge–I’ll worry about that when Monday rolls around again; the last thing I need is to worry about work over this holiday weekend. I did run some errands on my way home, and managed to get some things done around the apartment as well, but there’s more to do as always. I’ve got some laundry going right now, and it’s also “wash the bedding” day, too. Paul’s planning on going to the gym this morning when he gets up, and then we’re going to probably go see the latest Jurassic movie as a treat to ourselves. Just before bed last night I started writing a post about the holiday, and the signing of the Declaration of Independence, and how I don’t really feel particularly proud of my country anymore after yesterday’s passage of the heinous legislation that takes us back to pre-FDR days…which was such a great time in our history for the poor and the working and middle classes. I’ll probably finish it this morning and post it–else I’ll have to save it for another time, and is there a more appropriate time to look back as well as to mourn for the country?

There’s the added plus that being critical of the administration will no doubt get me on a list, if I’m not on one already just for being a gay creative with socialist beliefs and values.

Ironically, we streamed a movie last night which was a fun, enjoyable watch–Heads of State, starring John Cena and Idris Elba and Priyanka Chopra, with Jack Quaid in a hilarious supporting role. It’s a silly premise, and it’s an action-adventure movie which opens with Air Force One being shot out of the sky above Belarus, and the President (Cena) and the British Prime Minister (Elba) escape with parachutes and have to get back to civilization to save the NATO Alliance, while trying to figure out who is the insider who helped set up the attack on Air Force One and sent assassins to finish them off. Lots of action, lots of funny situations and dialogue, and a very charismatic, likable cast made it a lot of fun to watch. It’s not going to ever make AFI’s Top 100 Films of All Time list, but it was a terrific diversion for the evening. I did stay up later than usual–the whole 4th of July entry thing, which may actually be better for the newsletter than the blog…decisions, decisions. It’s cloudy this morning, but according to the weather there’s no chance of rain for the weekend, which is a bit disappointing as I love the rain, but what can you do?

I want to finish reading Summerhouse this weekend, and make headway on The Crying Child and Sing Me a Death Song, too. My next read is going to be Megan Abbott’s El Dorado Drive. and will probably do another Jay Bennett for y/a and the next reread will be maybe something by either Mary Stewart or Phyllis A. Whitney, as I love them both and I want to write more about them both. I also want to get some writing done this weekend, as well. I don’t feel tired this morning, which is a nice thing, and Sparky isn’t demanding either my desk chair or my lap (yet, at any rate) so I am going to work on the kitchen a bit this morning while having Youtube on so I can get caught up on the insanity of the world (someone really should write a series of essays about where we are as a nation and what led us here and call it As the World Burns) which will inevitably make me angry and/or depressed and will spoil the rest of the day and maybe I’ll just not do that? There are always LSU highlight videos, after all.

In other exciting news, I found Go Ask Alice on a streaming service, and Paul and I agreed that a rewatch for the first time in fifty years could be campy fun; it was a message-oriented made for television movie based on a fraudulent “diary” novel that hit you over the head with its message and probably was the first real ABC Afterschool Special (I knew the book was bullshit when I read it, and was only eleven, but it fooled a shit ton of people).

And on that note, I have dishes to wash and laundry to fold, so I am going to bring this to a close and open the 4th of July draft to work on while doing the chores. Have a lovely holiday, Constant Reader, and I’ll be back shortly!

Adorable out actor Brandon Flynn, whose career is really taking off.

Windows

It’s the eve of July 4th, and all through the house–not a creature is stirring (besides me and Sparky), not even a mouse! (Thank God. The lack of mice means Sparky is earning his keep. I’ve not even seen a flying roach in the house this year.)

Sigh.

I woke up feeling sinus-y this morning, with a bit of a sore throat and a runny nose. I took a Claritin a little while ago, which hopefully will clear this all up. One can hope, at any rate. I was tired last night when I got home, so was kind of useless for the evening. We finished watching Olympo, which picked up the pace significantly in its final episodes, and I’m not sure there’s going to be another season, although they did leave most everything hanging in the meantime, and there was a cliffhanger. I am also feeling a bit worn down this morning as I sip my coffee and Sparky climbs all over me and my desk. It’s going to rain this afternoon (and most of the day tomorrow, it looks like), and I have some errands to run after I get off work–so I don’t have to run any this weekend. We’re thinking about going to see Jurassic World Rebirth tomorrow (Jonathan Bailey and his slutty glasses are a big draw); and I must confess I’ve never seen anything Jurassic on the big screen. (We are also going to see Superman next weekend.)

I am hoping to get some rest this holiday weekend. I think my lethargy this week was a kind of hangover from the trip last weekend, despite having Sunday as a recovery day. I keep forgetting that I am older than I was and my body has already been through a massive trauma this year already that I am still recovering from as well. It was probably too close to the illness for me to do all that driving and exertion; but I’ve also never been that ill before so am not sure how long the recovery will take–or if this is the new normal. That’s the lovely thing about getting old without a user manual; you always wonder if something is a result of getting older and this is how it’s going to be for the rest of your life. I am hoping, at any rate, to do some writing tonight and over the weekend, finish reading the three books I am currently in process of enjoying, and pick out three new ones. I got the new Megan Abbott, El Dorado Drive, this week and it may hop to the top of the pile. My reading goal for the year is to reread a bunch of Gothics, read/reread some young adult novels, and get through the books in the stack on the end table in the living room before moving on to the top shelf of the left bookcase (who am I kidding, once I clear off the end table I’ll make a new stack on the end table). I also have a lot of other books from the past year or so that I’d like to get caught up on, but I don’t seem to read as fast as I used to, and I am not going on another road trip until October when I can listen to another book.

I hate not having the energy that I used to have.

And I have another infusion a week from Monday. Hopefully I am getting used to them, and the second won’t make me as tired and lethargic as the first one did. We shall see. I still need to go get lab work done before my next appointment with my primary care physician in August, and I need to figure out which of these bills I need to pay and which ones I don’t–I hit my deductible but am getting bills still, which is kind of confusing? One of the things on my to-do list is to get this all figured out. I just don’t want to pay anything I don’t have to, you know? It’s so fucking exhausting, you know? Heavy heaving sigh. But at least work today is going to be fairly easy; we have a light schedule so I can get a lot of my Admin work done and get things caught up for the end of the fiscal year. I do have to run some errands on the way home tonight–mail and a relatively minor grocery run–but after that, I am hoping to get the chores done and the house in some better semblance of order.

And on that note, I am heading into the spice mines. Have a lovely July 4th Eve, and I will most likely be back in the morning.

Nuno Gallego, formerly of Elite and now starring in OLYMPO