I Shall Be Released

I was sent home from the hospital yesterday morning. I have ulcerative colitis; which falls under the “irritable bowel syndrome” family of gastrointestinal disorders. As bad as I was, it could have still been worse. The significant weight loss (which all my gay male friends wanted to know the secret–um, do not recommend) was intense and scary; when I saw the specialist Tuesday afternoon he saw my tests results and admitted me immediately. I wound up spending six days in total in the hospital; a “forced vacation with rest”, as a friend put it. It was weird; I’ve never been attended to hand-and-foot that way before, let alone hovered over and monitored–well, by anyone outside my mother. Almost every one of the nurses at some point mentioned how nice I was and such a lovely patient to work with–see how sick I was? At the same time, I was always polite, didn’t ask them to do much for me, and always said please and thank you. Do people not have good manners anymore? You’re taking care of me, of course I’m going to treat you with respect.

But it’s nice to know what is wrong at last, and even nicer to know there was nothing I could have done to prevent it from happening. I went back on solid food after the colonoscopy–bingeing television means lots of food ads; I don’t think I’ve ever been that hungry before–and I do feel much better. I’m still weak from the weight loss, and perhaps not as steady on my feet as I should be, but I was also pretty much in bed for a week, so not that surprising, really.

I also feel rested, which is nice, and has been a while since I’ve felt this way. Another reminder that I need to take better care of myself, and pay more attention to my body when it’s trying to tell me I am reaching a flashpoint. I did have a mental collapse during the illness, but it was also before I went into the hospital. I did get also get a cool idea of how to repurpose a failed novel manuscript, but for the most part I turned my brain off and let it relax. I have no idea what’s going on in the rest of the world (other than an American pope with New Orleans ties), and I kind of don’t want to find out.

I also am taking this week off from writing stress.

And now, I am going to head into the spice mines. Have a great Monday, and I’ll be back in the morning.