The Rose

Good morning, first Saturday of the new year, how you doing?

It was cold yesterday in New Orleans; in the forties when I woke up, and I felt ill pretty much most of the morning. I ate breakfast and felt somewhat better, but the rest of the day was pretty much the same–one minute I’d feel fine, then the next I’d feel bad again. This was unfortunate because our office holiday party (delayed) was also last evening; I wasn’t able to have anything to drink because I didn’t trust my stomach and I wound up leaving early to come home. I was also very tired all day; my sleep was restless and wretched, which undoubtedly had a large part in the not feeling well. Last night I managed to sleep for almost eleven hours…so yes, I must have been terribly tired, and this morning, while it is cold again in the Lost Apartment, I feel rested and much better than I did yesterday.

My blood sugar–which I was concerned about yesterday as well–seems to be okay this morning as well. I guess the blood sugar thing–which was a concern yesterday–wasn’t really anything to be concerned about. It’s so lovely getting old; such a myriad of things to run through your head when you don’t feel well, you know?

As such, when I got home from the holiday party I gratefully sank down into my easy chair and finished watching Great Greek Myths on Prime; the Oedipus myth in particular is gruesome and horrible and grim. Poor dude; and none of it was his fault. The episode filled in the back story of his parents, King Laius and Queen Jocasta, and all the horror that happens to Oedipus is because of something his father did before he was even born. Truly horrible, right? Those Greek gods…now I want to find my copy of Edith Hamilton and reread it; it’s been years. (Shameless Greek mythology plug: read Madeline Miller’s Circe! It was one of the best–if not the best–book I read last year. And now, back to your regularly scheduled programming.)

Today I am mostly going to hang around the house and clean/write/edit. I’m going to go to get groceries tomorrow; Paul has errands and appointments today, so I am going to take advantage of the quiet and still around the house to get things done as well as be productive with my own stuff. I also want to finish my reread of The Shining, which I am enjoying and appreciating more than I did before. I am also figuring out why I didn’t care for it as much as I did before–which I always assumed was based on the holes in the plot (why would anyone build a luxury hotel in the Rocky Mountains that can’t be used for winter sports and is closed for the winter season? AND WHAT PARENTS WOULD TAKE THEIR SMALL CHILD SOMEWHERE SO REMOTE AND CUT OFF FROM MEDICAL HELP?) but I am also starting to understand that it triggered some things in my subconscious that made me predisposed to not enjoy it; I am not a big fan of small children in peril, particularly if the peril is from one of his/her parents. But it’s terrifically written and structured; the shifting POV from all three members of the Torrance family is particularly ingenious as it helps create a strong sense of claustrophobia within the enormous hotel. The book also serves as a marvelous kind of time capsule; The Shining probably couldn’t be published today because readers would have little-to-no sympathy for Wendy. But in the 1970’s, while certainly becoming more common-place, divorce was still enough of a taboo that women wanted to avoid it and make their marriages work no matter what the cost–even after her husband breaks her son’s arm. (The story would end there today; corporal punishment and spankings and so forth were still considered fairly normal in the 1970’s….but today Jack would have been talking to the police after Danny’s arm was set.)

But one thing that is particularly stellar about the book is that sense of impending doom. The reader knows, obviously, that the Overlook is a bad place and going there for the winter is an enormous mistake for the Torrances; but King also does a really good job of showing their desperation and that this winter job is the last chance for them to make it as a family. But you can’t help but hope they’ll somehow survive the winter, and one thing I think the film missed out on completely was how the book showed Jack. Yes, he is a terribly flawed human being with a horrible temper and an alcoholic, and a lesser writer would have simply allowed Jack to become the villain of the story, which he kind of is…but King creates him as a complex character and shows all sides of him; and he clearly loves his wife and son even if he is a fuck-up. The real villain in King’s novel is the hotel itself, a bad place, and how it exploits Jack’s weaknesses. The way King shows his psychological collapse, and how the hotel’s evil influence slowly starts to take control of him, is masterful…particularly given how early in his career he wrote this book.

And so, once I post this, I am going to get cleaned up and start laundering the bed linens. I want to also clean out some of the books–another purge–and perhaps some light cleaning while I read and edit and get the things done today that I need to get done today. I feel very rested (thank you, long night’s sleep) and use this day to get organized once and for all. I started getting things organized that I am working on yesterday morning, despite feeling like shit, and I feel much better about things, quite frankly. But organized is always better than disorganized, and it’s unfortunate and sad how often I allow laziness to let me slip into disorganization and being scattered.

It’s just wrong.

And something I should work on.

But then again, what isn’t?

And now into the spice mines with me. Have a lovely Saturday, all, and Happy Epiphany Eve!

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Escape

Friday and the first work “week” of the new year is coming to an end. This week has been kind of crazy from start to finish–a lot of stuff got crammed into the last three days, believe you me–and starting off-balance to begin with (result of the weird work weeks of the last two weeks with the extended weekends) wasn’t a good thing. I think I am getting everything back in balance, and I am really hoping I’ll be back on top of things and my usual Gregalicious self soon.

I’ve been off-balance now for quite some time; a lot of it has to do with the day job move and its aftermath and after-effects. Add in a trip to Kentucky, the holidays, and the Great Data Disaster of 2018; there’s your recipe for an off-balance Gregalicious. But I managed to get some things done, I managed to get some work done on the books, and now I am going to try to get myself settled back into the new normal.

So, of course last night was a shitty night’s sleep and this morning i feel like crap. My sinuses are also acting up (thank you, cool damp weather!), and I had gone to bed with high hopes of powering through today and getting caught up and getting a handle on the things I don’t feel like I have a handle on–which is everything. I need to get organized, make a list of what I need to get down with notes on how to get them done, and take control.

But I don’t feel good.

Ah, it’s only forty-eight degrees outside at the moment; which is why it feels so cold in the Lost Apartment and probably part of the reason why I don’t feel so hot. I’ve also had a toothache most of the week.

I’ve been watching this interesting series on Prime called Great Greek Myths, and every single episode I think this is not how I remember this myth! But of course, Greek mythology had to be sanitized in order to be taught to children! The gods of Olympus were always petty, even in the sanitized versions, but wow–the way the myths are told on this show–they are even more petty than I would have ever dreamed. Also, this show goes into more detail about homosexual relationships amongst the gods, particularly with beautiful human males, which makes it even more interesting for me.

But hopefully I can get everything done today that I need to get done by powering through it all, and maybe even get a good night’s sleep tonight. There’s a lot I want to get done on this first football-free weekend of the year…and without football to distract me from everything else I should be okay.

And on that note, I’m going to get some more coffee and head back down into the spice mines.

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